Just Reflecting……..

You know I was sitting outside in my backyard today, i’ve been doing that a lot lately I get up, do whatever I do in the morning and then go in the backyard (I take my dog out if it didn’t rain, but if it did or does I keep her inside although I didn’t know the grass was wet today and I took her out because it was sunny and well she had fun rolling around in the grass) anyway back to reflecting, so I went into the backyard today and I just walked around a bit in the grass while my dog was doing her thing and running around in the back and i’ve just been thinking and reflecting on a lot, I sat on the back steps and in the grass and was just taking in everything, listening to the birds and the natural noises of nature it was really nice……..you know we don’t really realize how much just listening to the pretty noises of the earth can help you really reflect on everything.

Lately for me i’ve just been reflecting on my life and where I want to go with it, if i’m being honest I don’t really get out the house much except for if i’m going in the backyard or if I go places with friends or family and I don’t really have a lot of friends, just a small amount that i’m close with and they don’t really live near me so I don’t go anywhere and I know that’s not good and I should go out more, but in all reality I don’t really like going out much for one, because I was never really a big fan for going out, I always preferred to stay in and if I do go out (which I don’t much) I like going with someone, because it’s just a lot more fun that way and you have good company in the process, but i’ve come to really take in everything and I realize that being and staying in one place isn’t healthy for yourself and if you want to experience more you’ll have to put yourself out there first and that’s what i’ve been trying to work on for a long time now.

I started to push myself where I use to live and I really enjoyed it because I liked where I was and the area, it was one of my favorite places and still is, but when we moved I kinda went back and just stood to myself and didn’t go anywhere because I didn’t like the area, not saying it’s bad, i’m just saying that it didn’t feel the same compared to where I use to live, I mean it’s alright, but I wasn’t really thrilled with moving here in the first place, plus I was away from my friends and I didn’t like that very much. I just missed everything about where I use to be. I missed being able to walk to my friends house who was a few blocks away from me, if my friends wanted to come over they could’ve easily and just the area it’s self, I still miss it and that’s not gonna change, but I also know that I can’t keep myself in the same spot all the time, I do need to get out more and just try at least, even if I don’t like where i’m at, I should at least try……building up the courage and confidence for it though is a bit hard, but i’m working on it……..sometimes we all need to reflect on things and just really look at ourselves in order to change things in our lives.

We all have something that we reflect on be it our lives, things around us just everything, sometimes we’ll even reflect on music or a book we read, just because maybe it really spoke to us in someway or because we’re trying to decipher the message it’s trying to tell us. We don’t have to just reflect on one thing, it can be a lot of different things, if it sticks in our minds or we feel it then we’re gonna reflect on it, sitting with yourself and being able to reflect on everything going on, helps you really look at things in a different perspective then what you normally see it as and it’ll help to open your eyes better and see things clearer to where it make sense. Take time to reflect on things if you really need to because it’s always good to sit with yourself and ponder a bit just to kinda gather everything and get a better insight on everything in the process.

That’s all I have to say, I know this isn’t a really long blog post compared to my other ones, but this is just something that I wanted to share because I felt like I needed to, i’ve been constantly really looking at myself lately and just thinking a lot more on everything. I hope that you’re able to take something from this and it gets you thinking as well, I also hope that everything I said here made sense, I started writing this earlier today, but I went away from it a bit and then I came back because…….I don’t know I felt I needed to, but anyway I hope you all have a goodnight/morning and or evening.

(Originally Written July 30th)

 

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~

Late Night Writing Mixed With A Little Bit Of An Update On My Other Blog Posts You Haven’t Read Yet…..

You ever went to write something and then other thoughts popped into your mind and what you were originally going to talk about just ended up changing into a whole different topic!? Yeeeah that happened with me, you see I know I didn’t post a blog for you yesterday (I say yesterday because it’s midnight now where i’m at) I also know I  didn’t post one the day before yesterday either, so I missed my blog posting on the 27th and the 28th of July……..but I just missed posting, I never said I didn’t write anything, I did write something on those days, the post that was mean’t for 27th is about thunderstorms and storms in general, there’s a reasoning behind why I wrote about storms, there’s a lot more to it then you think, it’s actually finished, but i’m still looking it over because…..I don’t know I just do that……so it’s kinda one of those draft writes, but once it’s really finish, you guys will read it.

Now as for the one that was meant to be posted yesterday on the 28th of July, that wasn’t posted yet for two reasons 1. i’m still adding to it because it’s not finished and 2. It’s something that i’m not sure i’m gonna post right away, but it will be posted eventually so it’s one of those i’m gonna come back to it kinda thing. It’s sorta like if you’re well writing something on a piece of paper and you know it’s coming along, but there’s just something in you that’s like I don’t know if i’m ready to share this yet or one of those moments where you think what you’re writing is good and then you realize “mmm maybe not” and toss it in a bin but miss, but i’m gonna keep writing and when the time comes to where I do want to share it, I will. We all have at least one blog post or just that one draft write (if you’re writing in a journal or something) that we have written already or started writing, but aren’t ready to share because either it’s really personal to us and we haven’t ourselves took in what we wrote or it’s just one of those “ehhhh i’m not really feeling this too much” kinda situation, you know what I mean!?

It’s okay to write something and not want to post it or share it, sometimes you need to just write for yourself especially if you have so many thoughts going around in your head to where you just need to get them out and hey if that’s what you need then it’s totally okay. We don’t always have to write something big, sometimes we just all need one of those, “I have a lot on my mind so i’m just gonna write everything i’m thinking or even one of these late night writes that i’m doing here, we all know that sometimes our minds can get so overwhelmed that we can’t even properly think straight and hey it’s gonna happen and yeah we’ll get a little frustrated because we know we want to write about topics that really make you think or is something relatable and yet here we are at 12:41am close to 1am writing about how we have so many thoughts running around our brains.

I was actually writing two different blog post (the ones mention early) I was literally going back and forth between the two posts writing different things going with the topic of those blog post and while I was doing that, I had another blog post idea and this was it. What better way to talk about the amount of thoughts going on in my brain then writing about it. In all honesty I don’t even know if this ones gonna be good, but I just needed to get this out and also explain to you guys why I didn’t post anything new for two days, one of the reasons is because I wasn’t having the best day and I couldn’t focus on writing and I tried, but I wasn’t getting anywhere that was until a storm came around 2 days ago and then I wrote about that, the other one was because i’m not finished with it and i’m not sure if i’m gonna post it right away as I normally do and also because I was out, so by the time I got back it was already late so I knew I wasn’t going to finish it in time before the day ended.

I was actually thinking of just going straight to sleep once I came back, but I really wanted to write something for you guys considering I haven’t posted in two days and believe me i’m super tired, but I did want to write something, i’m not really sure if you’ll take anything from this that’s important, but at least you’ll know that……..in all honestly I got nothing here, but I do hope you still enjoy this in a way, i’ll get back to my normal important stuff as soon as I can, for now though that’s all I got, my brain can’t think anymore, this is probably the shortest blog posts I ever written since I started, well anyway I hope you all have a goodnight/morning and or evening.

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~

 

Update: This was mean’t to be posted last night, but I fell asleep when I was going to post it and when I woke up i think it was around 1:30am or close to 2am so I just turned off my computer and went to sleep, but i’m still gonna post this, I hope you guys enjoy in some way (Originally written on the 28th of July)

 

 

Finding My Niche (My Confidence Struggle Story)

Confidence is something we all struggle with at some point in our lives, for some confidence comes pretty easy at least it seems like it, for those who have a lot of confidence i’m sure they at one point in their life didn’t have it and had to build up theirs until they had enough to feel good about themselves, sure there are a lot of other people who’s confidence is off the roof and it makes you wonder whether if they are just full of themselves, if that’s just their way of trying to get people’s attention or if it actually took them so long to gain the confidence and because they now have it, they’re happy and are just showing a different side to themselves that they never knew they had. Having so much confidence isn’t always a bad thing it just shows that you’re proud of who you are and who you’ve become if you struggled with confidence for a while, however sometimes for some people having so much confidence can get to you and it can turn you into a completely different person that isn’t good for you and that’s just gonna leave you in the middle of the road in the pouring rain by yourself, with that said though people who struggle with confidence there’s always a reason for it, maybe they had something really big happen in their lives to where confidence was hard to gain or every time they were confident about something they had people around them kinda push them down a notch or they just have trouble really seeing themselves the way others see them, there’s a lot of different reasons.

Some may think that having confidence is bad but it’s not, it’s just all on how you use your confidence, but if you’re the kind of person who struggles with being confident don’t you worry you’re not alone here, I too struggle with confidence, it was always one of those things I never really embraced, It’s weird though because I am happy with myself and I love who I am as a person, sure I have my flaws, but doesn’t everyone!? When it comes to confidence within myself and my personality that i’m good with, so if someone calls me weird and tells me I talk a lot, it doesn’t bother me because i’m happy with who I am personality wise, but when it comes to having confidence in my abilities and the things I do, that’s a different story……….you see I always had this thing where I would start something and i’d make progress with it, but then after a while i’d stop doing it and would never finish it, for example: Youtube, a lot of you won’t know this, but I did Youtube and I still have it, but I don’t upload on it much. I started Youtube a few times my first channel was back in i’d say 2011!? ( I checked it was in 2011) anyway so yeah I did Youtube a few times I have 3, but I only use 2, my first one I haven’t used in years though.

Long story short with me doing Youtube I never use to be super consistent with it, when I did start it I would post not everyday, but more than I did after I had it for a while if that makes sense and i’d enjoy it and have fun with it, but I wouldn’t really put my all into it, I had all these ideas and i’d write them down, but I wouldn’t go forth with most of them because I wasn’t feeling confident enough with it, there were times I had something going and then i’d give up on it after a while because I didn’t feel it anymore, well more like I wasn’t sure how it would be perceived so I stopped it before it could get somewhere……..I guess you can say I was scared in a way, you see yourself doing well and you’re happy, but then that doubt in you comes to play and tries to throw you off course and makes you second guess yourself, telling you that your ideas aren’t gonna work and no ones gonna like it, so everything where i’d put a lot of my heart into and would give a try, i’d step back and just pretty much abandon it, giving up on my ideas and the hard work that I’d put into it……..and I would try so hard not to do that, i’d step away from my channels thinking that I would come back a different person, but it was always the same person coming back, i’d stay for a bit, then disappear for a few months then come back once more and you get it.

So that’s where my confidence lacks, I would give up on myself and my ideas before I even got started and by me doing that to myself where i’d start something and not finish it, that caused me to sorta have an identity breakdown in a way, everything I tried to stick with I never stuck with and it just got the point where I just didn’t care anymore and I just kinda gave up in a way, I use to constantly wonder what I was gonna do with myself and with that it caused me to become unhappy with myself and I didn’t like that. I’d always express the way I felt to my friends and my boyfriend and goodness i’m surprised they’re still around because most people would just get tired of the same thing and you constantly telling them how you just don’t know what to do with yourself, but they always were patient with me and always gave me advice, the main things they’d say was to just stay consistent, focused and have fun with it and even though I would constantly beat myself up on it, they were always so supportive and believed that I would find something, always saw and still see the best in me when I didn’t see it myself, it’s just great to have people like that who even when you kick yourself down or you think that what you’re doing isn’t good, they’ll always tell you that you’re doing great, how proud they are of you, how they will always support you no matter what and that they’d always be there if anything.

When it came to finding my niche though, It wasn’t until I asked my friend Ray about her blog  and I was always curious on what it was like to have a blog, it was always one of my interests, but I never was sure whether to start one or not because I didn’t know if I was going be good at it but I realized when I was going through a self discovery thing and trying to find what was for me, I noticed how much I started writing more and I always questioned why it was I had so many journals and why I was so obsessed with them, but I also never questioned it at the same time, because I was happy. People would always ask why do you need/have so many journals!? and i’d always respond with “well because I like them” but I never actually questioned it unless someone would point it out and then i’d think “yeah why do I have so many Journals!?” but back to my friend Ray, so I asked her about blogging and she told me all that she knew and gave me advice and I told her I was thinking of starting one and she told me I should because in her words when she did it, she remembered how cozy it made her feel being able to write whatever she wanted and it’s thanks to her I now write everyday. She actually got me started on it and yeah I was nervous on starting it because I didn’t want to mess it up and have it be another thing that I give up on, I wanted this time to be different and I wanted to really have something that I could be proud of and say hey I do this everyday and i’m happy about it.

Well now I can finally say i’m happy and I mean happy then I ever was when I was doing Youtube not saying I didn’t like it I did, it helped me show my personality and I got to have fun with it, but what i’m saying is I love writing just a little bit more and it’s now been 2 weeks since I started blogging (2 weeks yesterday) and I keep saying to the people that know I blog and support me on it, that I feel like I finally found my thing and i’m proud of not only the blog, but also myself because i’m pushing myself everyday and really putting my heart and soul into it without feeling like I have to, it’s always because I want to and with writing I said this to my boyfriend yesterday, I always feel like it’s the one thing that I don’t ever have to question or doubt myself in because I love it so much and being able to express myself in a way that I may not be able to out loud, but I can with writing, makes me feel really good and also pretty confident in a way because I know that with this I don’t have to think twice, I can just write.

Confidence isn’t a feeling, I mean it is, but confidence comes from within you and all the different things that you do, so if you see that you’re doing something, you’re enjoying it and you see that you’re progressing in it, keep going and if you have ideas or you are feeling really good about something to where it’s making you happy, then try them out and don’t be discouraged on seeing where it can go and where it can take you, if you go into something with confidence and a positive mindset, you’re already there because you’re confident in your ideas, you’re believing in your abilities and just yourself in general. As for finding your niche (your thing) that will come to you naturally, you just got to let it and if you aren’t sure what your thing is try looking at the things you do the most and where you’re always being drawn to, maybe that’ll give you an idea on what is made for you. I hope you’re able to find your niche in life and when you do stick with it, believe in it and most importantly believe in yourself. If you’re having self doubt about whether something will work or not just replace those thoughts with it will work if I make it work. If you believe in something then go with it and just see what happens when you bring your ideas to life, it may surprise you and in the process you’ll become more confident and proud of yourself knowing you went for it.

Aaaaand that’s my blog post for today (tonight) I didn’t expect to write this much and for it to be this long, but sometimes you just gotta let your heart and soul do the speaking for you, I was having a conversation with my boyfriend on this topic yesterday and I guess it stuck with me and I needed to get my realizations out about myself, I hope you guys are able to take something from this blog post even though I pretty much told a story here………maybe there’s something in here that you can take from it who knows, anyways I hope you all have a goodnight/morning and or evening.

Originally written On July 26

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~

Stay Strong Your Breakthrough Will Come Within Time Dear………

Life can be rough sometimes as we all know, but we go through it and do the best that we can to keep our heads up when stuff around us start to fall apart, but let’s face it we all know that eventually we’re all gonna have a few breakdowns from time to time and we can try and save face and be positive about everything, but most of the time it’s just not gonna work. So what do you do when you’ve had so many good days where you’ve felt the most confident you’ve ever felt in ages and then out of nowhere there’s that one day where you just come undone and feel like if what you’re even doing is worth it or you just feel defeated of some sort!? I don’t have the answer really to this, but what I can say is, if you are feeling like you’re coming undone…….just let it out and feel what you’re feeling, sure maybe you don’t know why it is you’re feeling the way you are, but letting it out and knowing you’re feeling the way you do helps you to not have to hold it in, because you should never hold in your feelings, know that it’s okay to fall apart once in a while, especially when you’ve held yourself together for so long.

Falling apart doesn’t mean that you aren’t strong, having the feeling of wanting to fall apart sometimes is only you being human and you have every right to feel the emotions that you do, I think I said this before and if I didn’t i’ll say it now, no one is 100 percent happy all the time, you can try and be, but eventually everything around you, within you and just everything in general will catch up to you and you’re not gonna have any choice, but to breakdown and just let your emotions take over. They say we have the power to control our thoughts and that’s true, but sometimes when we try and control our thoughts sometimes they can get the better of us and whatever we’re feeling just starts to come out all at once just like a scattering rainstorm and once that happens there’s really nothing we can do in that moment, but to just let it happen.

No one likes to breakdown especially when it hits you out of nowhere, it makes you feel like your weak even when you tell yourself it’s normal, but no matter how much you try and pick yourself up, you know that you’re just gonna end up breaking down anyway, but just know that breakdowns aren’t a bad thing. Breakdowns help you get all those emotions you’ve been keeping pent up for so long out, but sometimes they like to sneak up on you when you’re at your highest, pretty much reminding you that your other emotions exist too not that we don’t know that, but don’t think that when you have your moment of vulnerability that you should dismiss it and not feel it………no feel it because if it’s happening it’s because you need to let it out and don’t worry about what others think when it comes to your emotions, everyone has their breaking point so don’t feel bad for having yours when you do.

With all that said even when you’re breaking down, once you stop feeling it and you’ve let out all the emotions that you could, remember that even when you’re coming undone you’re still strong and you still have so much to give. It’s okay to fall down sometimes as long as you get back up and keep on pushing, even when you’re at your lowest of lows just keep on pushing and stay as strong as you can until you have to let your emotions out again, everything that’s happening is gonna makes you so much more stronger than you already are, you just gotta be willing to fall a few times, but even when you do fall just know that you won’t be on the ground for long, either you’ll get yourself up or you’ll have someone willing to help you through it all, while make sure that you’re okay in the process.

Know that within time everything you’re going for and are keeping your focus on will see the light and will all be worth it, you just hang in there and keep going and remember breakdowns are just for the moment so don’t stress too much on it, just let them happen when they do and like the title of this blog post says, stay strong and know that your breakthrough will come within time, you’re doing great with whatever it is you’re doing, so don’t let others discourage you and don’t let yourself fall too far, if you happen to let yourself fall too far just know that if you want to, you’ll find your way back. Trust in yourself and keep going after what you want, sooner or later you’ll get there and when you do, take that well deserved breath and take everything in while you’re at it, there’s a possibility you’ll fall apart and break down, but this time it’ll be different.

Okay so that’s all from me for now, I hope you all are able to take something from today’s blog post and if you’re going through a rough time at the moment I hope you’re okay and I wish you nothing, but the best for you in your life journey, know that you are all greatness if you believe in yourself and the things you’re capable of. Stay strong, keep pushing and know that everything will be alright and it’ll work out. Hope you guys have a goodnight/morning and or evening.

 

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~

 

 

Don’t Forget To Recharge Sometimes…..

Recharging yourself when you need to is really important, but sometimes we all get so caught up in our everyday lives, for some busy schedules and others just things that take up a lot of our time, that we forget to stop and just take the moment to relax and recharge a bit, some even will keep going without ever getting rest and if they do it’s only for a short period of time until they’re back on their feet heading straight back into everything. Recharging yourself though is super important because when you take time to relax after a long day of doing something productive, not only will you feel better, but so will everything within you be it your mind, body, just everything you need to continue on with everything you’re doing in your life.

Working hard and getting things done is great because everyone enjoys doing something and feeling like even if they didn’t do anything big, it’s still good to feel like you were productive and because you feel good about being productive, you start to feel accomplished and you just feel good all around, but even though it’s good to feel productive you still have to make time to give yourself the time you need to just sit down, relax and recharge so that way you don’t wear yourself out in the process of being productive. If you’re the kind of person who is constantly just going without rest then this is for you, it’s also for those who need more rest in their life too, but this is mainly for those who think they don’t need to rest because they feel they have so much to do and so resting isn’t an option until they finish all that they have on their plate.

Trust me when I say that, the more you keep going and going without taking a break, the more chance you have at running yourself into the ground, I should know because I did that once and it cost me to lose my voice to the point where I had no choice, but to take a break and I was soooo upset and frustrated because my only focus was I have to get stuff done and I can’t, I didn’t even care about my own well being. When you are constantly working hard at something and pushing yourself to your limits to the point where everything in you is working over time, it’s gonna let you know that you need to take a breather and if you ignore what your body and mind are telling you it’s gotta make you listen by forcing you to stop whether you like it or not. Once you start not caring about your own well being, that’s the day you have to really step back from everything and look within yourself and tell yourself that what you’re doing isn’t right and you need to take a moment to help yourself get better and back on your feet in a healthy way.

I know sometimes it’s not always easy to take a moment or two to yourself to recharge and relax, but don’t ever say that you can’t, if you want to take time you will, it’s all about making time to just take a breather every now and then, even if it’s just for 10-20 minutes as long as you give yourself the time to just drop everything for a moment and take everything in and just catch your breath, then believe me you will feel loads better. You can’t go through your day and think you can continue to keep going when you know that you’re running on empty, so even if it’s just for a moment make sure to take some time for yourself and recharge every now and again, trust me you owe it to yourself to stop everything and rest from time to time and when you do take that break be it a long one or a short one you’ll thank yourself and be glad you did.

Alrighty then that’s all from me for now, I hope you guys are able to take something from today’s blog post, it is super important to take time to yourself to recharge your energy, you always want to make sure that you don’t go and push yourself too hard to the point where you’re just not giving your all in what you want to give your all in. Your body and mind need that rest so that way it can give you the energy that you’re needing and looking for without draining yourself out. Anyway I hope this helps you guys if you’re in the process of looking to take time to relax more and if you’re unable to relax, try looking up different things to help you relax better, I know that drinking certain teas can help you relax, reading a book is also a good option, you can read it before bed or just when you want to de stress and chill out for a bit, listening to music, you know just stuff like that. Something’s bound to help you relax better, with all that I hope the days treating you all well and I hope you have a goodnight/morning/ and or evening.

 

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~

Choosing Your Battles Wisely While Still Trying To Keep The Peace Of Everything………

There are two types of people, we have the ones that when it comes to certain situations, they like to stay clear of whatever storm is headed in their directions, because they know that if they were to get involved there may possibly be a chance that they will get caught in the crossfire of it all, not being able to escape it. As for the other type, they LOVE to be in the middle of the storm and I don’t mean in a way that is good for them, no I mean they LOVE IT!! It’s like the minute they feel the wind pick up they become the storm and start to take down everything in their path no matter how anyone feels about it, I mean sure everyone gets worked up over something every now and then, but if you find yourself getting super worked up over something that really shouldn’t be a huge thing to where it’s causing you to take all the rage you have in you, burn people and then not even feel bad about all the destruction you just laid out everywhere, especially when you know that no one is hurting you or all they’re doing is trying to help you…..that should say a whole lot about yourself as a person.

You never want to be that person who has to go and ruin everyones day because you’re unhappy with the way everything is going in your life or just unhappy about a situation in general. i’m not saying this to put anyone down, but i’m just stating the facts here, no one wants to be around someone who they feel they have to be a certain way with because they’re scared that if they say the wrong thing a natural disaster is gonna form and everyone is gonna feel the wrath of that person’s anger, having people be intimidated by you isn’t something you should want, because that just keeps them from ever wanting to speak to you, let alone be around you. So if you want to know exactly how to keep away from the storm of a person’s wrath, i’ll do my best to give you some kind of advice on it. If you’re in the middle of the storm and there isn’t a way to get away from it, the best thing to do is just face it, but don’t roar back unless it’s absolutely necessary where you feel you have to, although you know that saying choose your battles wisely!? Yeah that saying is true, you don’t want to constantly have a back and forth with someone that you know no matter what you do or say they just always feel the need to one up you all the time.

People who feel the need to priorities their opinions over someone else’s, don’t really take other peoples opinions into consideration because the only opinion that matters is their own and that’s just how it’s going to be whether we agree or not. The only time someone else’s opinion matters is when they’re trying to get people to agree with them on their opinion, preferably those who respect them and see them as they could never be wrong. Pretty much there’s no winning unless you can say something to where they can’t say anything back because they know they are wrong and their defense mechanism is to either not continue the argument or disagreement they started or they just dismiss the whole thing while still being angry about whatever situation just occurred. Unless you have to, just let them say what they have to say even if what they are saying is completely wrong and most times they even they know that, but they won’t ever admit it because their pride is so strong and they will never let anyone else tell them they are wrong.

Just remember to pick your battles wisely if you’re ever stuck in a storm full of someone else’s rage and if you know that they aren’t going to listen to your side of things or just not listen to you in general, there’s no point in trying to compete with them on that level, sometimes things are just better left alone because people who like destruction feed off of more destruction, so it’s best to not add more fuel to the fire due to……..well because that’s just what they want, so just pick your battles wisely if you want to get out of there quickly. Now let’s talk about if you feel the storm coming, my advice is if you can, avoid it at all cost, some people say it’s best to stay in it like I just finished talking about, but if you know that you want no part in the storm and you can avoid it, do it, because it’s not worth it one bit to have someone try and over power you while belittling you and thinking that they can control you. No one can control you, but yourself and if you don’t want to be one of those victims taking part in the destruction of someone else’s wrath then you don’t have to. You can just go about your own business while that person is just making themselves unhappy, Do everything you can to just keep the peace around you and all that good energy within you, don’t let anyone take that away from you ever.

Things maybe be falling apart around you and becoming a mess, but as long as you keep the peace within yourself by staying calm, keeping positive and not getting sucked into the negativity that’s going on around you, then everything will be fine, maybe not in the moment around you, but it will be within you if you just trust yourself and keep yourself away from it all. Something in you will pull you away from all the drama and disaster going on and when it does just go with it, don’t question it, it’s doing it for a reason and that reason is because it doesn’t want you to have to deal with the negatives going on. Listen to your instincts and trust yourself whenever it’s trying to either tell you something, guide you away from where you don’t need to be and or when it’s guiding you to where you do need to be, You are the only person who you should be listening to when it comes to where you’re going in life and when it comes to your well being.

So that’s all from me for now, I know I wrote a bit but I just wanted to share this with you guys, I hope this helps if you’re in a situation like this and I hope you guys were able to take something with you from today’s blog post, anyway I don’t have much to say here so I hope you all have a lovely night/morning and or evening.

 

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~

Believe That Where You’re Headed Is Where You’re Mean’t To Go In Life…..

We all know that life likes to throw a whole lot of curve balls at us along with putting obstacles in our way whenever we think that everything’s going well, but did you ever wonder why it does that!? We don’t all have the answers to why certain things happen to us and why there are times when even when we push ourselves to being a different version of ourselves everyday, there will always be a time where we will come to a roadblock and then have to decide whether we let it stop us from moving forward or do we continue to keep moving on by either finding a different route or hop over it (if we’re able to) and just keep going. For some people they would probably chose a different route and sometimes a different route is a good choice, I mean it could take you to where you need to go quickly, but would it really be worth it to avoid the obstacle compared to just facing it head on and continuing to push through it even though it’s mean’t to keep you from progressing on your journey!? Some of you may say probably and some maybe thinking gee i’m not sure…..it’s okay if you don’t know the answer to this or if you have a different outlook on the situation, everyone has their thoughts and wonders of why life puts us in all these different predicaments sometimes, it’s normal to question why things happen and also wonder could all of this be for a reason or am I just having bad luck?

I’ll tell you though it isn’t bad luck, what is happening is every situation you happen to come across be it bad, good, humiliating or just anything really is all for a reason. I’ve been learning a lot lately and what I keep coming across is, whatever your mind is like that is how your life is going to be projected to you. What i’m saying is just in case I didn’t make sense there, whatever thoughts you think on a daily bases your mind is going to make your thoughts come to life and mirror it in front of you, whether you’re aware of it or not. Your thoughts control your life, so if you’re the type of person to always think on the worst side of things that’s gonna be your reality, same goes for if you’re the kind of person to think on the best side of things, no matter what your thoughts are that is what is gonna be portrayed in your reality. So if you want things to be less hectic and you want a different outcome in your life, try focusing on how your mind is because that will determine your reality and what your life will be like as well.

Now moving on from how your thoughts determine your reality, when it comes to the life your aiming for whatever that is, it could be anything that is fulling to you and that makes you happy. When you find that something that makes you happy and it doesn’t ever seem like a chore to you that’s when you know that you found what it is you were mean’t to do, sure you have other things you like doing, but if you find yourself constantly being drawn to something and you don’t really have an idea why, just go with it, especially if you know that when you’re being pulled towards it and you feel nothing but goodness inside you and you find yourself smiling because of it then go with the feeling. Sure it may not make sense at first and you’ll probably wonder why it is your so drawn to whatever is bringing you to realize what it is your made to do, but if you feel like something is saying “hey this is what you’re suppose to do” and you too start to feel something inside you change then that’s saying something. That’s telling you that, that’s where you thrive at the most. We all have things that pull us in from time to time and makes us want to take an interest just to see what it’s all about and see if we like it or not.

That’s just how we start to determine what category we fall in when it comes to our interest if that makes sense. When we finally find what it is we are mean’t to do, everything becomes clear and not as stressful, I actually saw a post I think it was today or yesterday, but it said something along the lines of when we finally find something that we want to do and commit to it then everything that feels overwhelming and that made you think i’m never gonna find something, all that will just start to fade away because you finally have that something that makes you happy and where you’re able to say  that’s my thing you know!? Finding that thing that makes you feel good inside and where it just naturally comes to you, that is the best feeling ever. Everything else that interest you sure that’s good as well, but the feeling you get when you have that thing, where you can call it yours that feeling is beyond compared.

So when you find that thing where something inside you is calling you to it, go with it, because it’s calling you for a reason and if you know in your heart and you feel in your soul that, that’s what you’re made to do, don’t pull away from it. Let what is made for you guide you toward where you want to be headed, trust that everything that is going on in your life is for a reason and never let anyone stop you or tell you how you should be living your life. Your life is your life and even though other people may not agree with the way you’re doing things, if you know that deep down you’re doing the right thing and you feel that what you’re doing is the best thing for you, then keep going and keep working towards where you feel you’re headed. You don’t have to know where you’re headed exactly, not everyone is gonna know that, some do, but for others it’s not always the case and that’s okay, some people do things best when they’re just going with the flow of things, knowing where you’re headed is good, but sometimes it’s not knowing where you’re headed that makes things just a little more fun along with a little scary as well. It’s okay to let life blow you all around the place, that’s just it’s way of saying that eventually you’ll know what is made for you until then just keep exploring and enjoy the journey.

Trust the waves of life and if you can’t fight against the current, try floating along with it, it may help you find where you’re meant to be along the way. Alrighty well that’s all from me for now, I thought i’d share this with you guys because right now i’m in the process of doing what I feel is right even though people around me think it’s not and just in case you’re in that predicament or you’re in that mindset where you’re not sure if what you’re doing is the right thing, if it feels right and you feel happier doing what you’re doing, then just keep pushing and keep doing your thing and if no ones told you this before well, you’re doing the best you can and i’m proud of you for how far you’ve come even if it’s not the biggest thing to everyone, if it’s big to you then i’m proud of you and you’re doing great. Hope you all have a lovely night/morning and evening and remember to hang in there and when the going gets tough just keep on pushing, you’ll get there.

 

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~

Dealing With Anxiety, Depression, Eating Disorders And Other Mental Illnesses…….

Let’s talk about dealing with Anxiety for a moment shall we!? I’m gonna be the one to say it and i’m sure a lot of you will agree if you too deal with anxiety on a daily basis. Anxiety is the WORST sometimes, especially when you’re dealing with something that shouldn’t be that big of a deal, but it is for some reason, it’s like no matter what you do your brain just likes to remind you there’s a problem and that it’s totally gonna make it a bigger problem then it actually is. Now i’ll be real because that’s why i’m writing this and I want to be as real as I can when it comes to my blog posts. I feel if you’re expressing yourself and words fail you when you need it most, writing about how you feel is the best way to get everything you’re thinking and feeling out, when you feel like you can’t really talk to anyone because they won’t really understand and get it, so you think to yourself “well since no one will listen or I know they’re not gonna understand and get it, i’ll just write it.” Writing really is a nice way to just de stress and get all your thoughts out of your mind, i’ve spoken about this before in my finding your happy place blog post, If you haven’t read that one you can read it here: Finding Your Happy Place…..

Anyway to dealing with Anxiety………this is a little hard for me because I don’t really like to talk about it, I only speak about it to certain people that I trust and are really close to me and the ones that I tell they either get it and understand because they too deal with certain things in their life or if they don’t get it, they will take the time to try and understand what it is i’m going through. When I was about 19 years old i’d say, I was in my teens (late teens) I had just graduated from high school or it was around the time I graduated. I went to see this specialist and with me i’m not really comfortable around certain people if I feel some kind of energy i’m not use to or that I don’t like, I stay away from it because I don’t like the way it makes me feel, so obviously if you know somethings bothering or you don’t like someone or you get a weird vibe you keep yourself away right!? So we saw this specialist and right away the vibe that I got even before I went inside the office they were in I hated it, I just didn’t like the atmosphere of the place, I hated everything about it, made me super anxious and it felt weird.

So we go into the office of the specialist who was speaking with me and I couldn’t make eye contact because I was super uncomfortable, I just wanted to get out of there so bad. While being in there, they had me do some…….I don’t know what it is, but it kinda is to see what is wrong with you, all I remember is having to look at pictures and tell them what I saw in them and also look at this book with different things in it and I think remember it or copy what I saw (It was a long time ago so I barely remember) but while doing those activities I still didn’t make eye contact with the specialist and if I did it was only for a second, like literally a second. Long story short…….good news is I was told i’m a really good visual learner and that made me happy, next part didn’t though………because he then says I have a problem with looking people in the eyes (Only people I don’t trust or like) that’s when I learned that what I had was anxiety………now I know there are a lot of different types of anxiety, but I was never really informed on which one I had so I don’t know exactly the kind I have…….but yeah I found out that I had developed anxiety and I never really understood what that was until I was told I had it. When you’re told that you’re dealing with some kind of mental illness it’s not always easy to process how you feel in that moment and to those around you, because they don’t understand it entirely and what it does to you, to them everything you’re feeling isn’t a big deal you know.

People who deal with a mental illness, be it Anxiety, Depression, Eating Disorders and all the different issues people go through on a daily basis. To them everything they’re feeling is real, it’s not just something in the moment, it’s not something you should be brushing off as just another problem and they’ll deal with it and be fine the next day……no…….those kind of illnesses don’t just go away, it’s there from the day they know they’re dealing with something, but don’t really understand what it is yet and i’ll be there for the rest of their life. People don’t understand that when it comes to dealing with a mental illness there’s a whole lot to learn, It’s not just “oh they’re going through their problems again or they’re having some kind of a bad day but no worries they’ll get over it and be okay” That’s not how it works. You ever heard that saying where it goes “The people who are the most happy are the ones suffering the most” Yeah that saying is true, people who have a daily battle within themselves, but try to save face just so people don’t ask them what’s wrong because they don’t want to have to face that fear of “if I tell them they will just think it ones of those normal issues that everyone goes through and tell me to just get over it” or they think they are being a burden on you so they won’t dare cross that line of feeling like fool and putting their mental issues on to someone else. I know that everyone goes through difficult times in their lives, but you also have to keep in mind that some people go through so much worst then what everyone thinks.

For those people who sit there and say “oh i’m so depressed” freely sure you might be, but why don’t you live in the mind of someone who deals with actual depression every day of their life. Same goes for someone dealing with anxiety and or other mental illnesses, you can’t just think that, that’s how it is because there’s a lot more to it then what society projects it as, A WHOLE LOT MORE…….When it comes to me, dealing with my anxiety is hard, i’m not gonna lie, people who deal with it will get it. Again I don’t know what kind of anxiety I have, I don’t think it’s social anxiety because when I want to i’m very expressive and I know how to make friends, but that’s only when I feel like I don’t have to pretend, I can just be me and I feel comfortable with my surroundings and with certain people. Although if you were to ask my family they’d probably tell you i’m anti-social, because honestly I don’t come out of my room so much. I stay to myself and in my room all the time, but that’s only because I enjoy being by myself, I prefer to be in my own space where I know I can be me and not have to worry about anything. When i’m around the right people though it’s like i’m a totally different person because like I said before, when I feel comfortable I can be very out-going and I enjoy myself.

If you were to watch me closely, you’d see how I am when i’m around friends or people i’m comfortable with, compared to when it’s just me and my family, it’s not that I don’t want to be around them, it’s just not my thing and plus I got so use to being by myself in my own space, it just kinda stuck with me……..To conclude what my point is here, when it comes to people who deal with Anxiety, Depression, Eating Disorders and other types of mental illness. You have to be kinder to them, you can’t just brush off their issues as normal things. You have to help them through it, talk to them about their feelings, reassure them, that kind of help, forcing them to come to you is not what you should do, go to them and really listen to how their feeling, don’t hear them, really listen. Let them know that whatever they’re going through, you’re there to help them get through it and you’re there if they need you. Stop treating mental illnesses like it’s nothing because to me and everyone else going through it, it’s not just nothing, it’s everything.

For those dealing with Anxiety, Depression and other mental illnesses, there are people who will help you and listen to you, don’t keep your emotions in, talk to someone, a friend, close family members just someone you trust and you know will really take the time to listen and also there’s a lot of different hotlines you call if you just need someone and you feel like no one will listen to you. Remember to hang in there and even though it doesn’t seem like it, things will get better and you will get through it.

That’s all from me I know this is probably the longest blog i’ve ever written, but I just felt that I had to say this because there are people dealing with these kinds of mental illnesses on a daily basis and people don’t seem to understand how serious it really is. I just hope that I said everything okay and yeah……I just want you all to know that this is from my point of you on everything and also has to do with what I feel when it comes to dealing with my Anxiety. I hope you’re all doing okay and I hope you have a good night/morning/evening.

 

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~

 

 

When People See The Best In You And Believe In You, Yet You Don’t See It In Yourself……..

It’s always crazy when you learn that people believe in you, you know!? especially when you for a long time didn’t believe in yourself all that much. We’ve all been through that at some point in our lives, something presents it’s self to us and we’re like “I don’t know about this” or we think of maybe trying something, but are afraid we’re not gonna be the best at it or we’re not good enough to do it…….yeah it happens to the best of us. The question is though, why is it that even when people tell us we’re capable of something and they believe in us, we still don’t believe them? It’s like no matter how much they tell us that we’re good enough and try to get us to see all the thing they see in us, we just brush it off and think they’re just saying that to make us feel good or something and sometimes some people do just say things to make us feel good because they don’t want us to feel a certain way (which isn’t always a bad thing) but what about those who really mean it!? It can be hard to decipher who’s real and who’s just feeling sorry for you.

People who truly want the best for you and can see the real you inside and out those are the kind of people you should surround yourself with, because they will always see the best in you even when you don’t see it in yourself. People who see you doing big things that you don’t even think that you can do because of how big it seems, those are the ones you should be around, because they will always try and make it seem simple just so you aren’t intimidated by it. People who don’t expect you to always stick to all the things you once loved and don’t force you to make a decision on things, but simply support anything and everything that you do even if it’s just the smallest things, keep them close because it doesn’t matter what you do or how you feel they will always be there to help you figure things out when you aren’t able to figure them out on your own.

You see anyone who sees so much in you and believes that you can do anything you put your mind to as well as wanting to help you succeed with whatever you’re trying to go after, those are the kind of people you need in your corner, because whenever you feel like giving up or you feel you’re not good enough for something, they will always push you hard for all the right reasons and make sure that you don’t give up and that you know you’re as good as you give yourself credit for. They’ll also tell you how you putting  yourself down isn’t what you should do and how you should really start believing in not only yourself, but all that you’re capable of when it comes to showing what you’re made of and that is what a real person who believes in you looks like and feels like.

When you finally find the people who truly just want to see you do well for yourself and you see how much they see in you that you don’t see in yourself, well that’s where you start to really look at yourself and say “Well if they believe I can do it, why shouldn’t I believe too!?” and from there you’re gonna want to not only make those who saw something in you proud, but also you’ll start to want to make yourself proud as well and help yourself see all the things you couldn’t see before. Sometimes we’re gonna come to that road where we just in a way give up on ourselves and just feel like “well what am I doing with myself!? ” There’s always gonna be someone to come along and show you why you’re here and help you through your journey of finding out what you’re mean’t to do with yourself, while also showing you why you should never give up on yourself even when it feels like there’s no hope. There’s always a way and you’re always gonna have people who when you feel like you’re just stuck in the dirt, they will dust you off and tell you to keep going while staying behind you just in case you need them again.

And that is my blog post for today, I kinda got inspired by my boyfriend here with this one because he’s one my biggest supporters, he never lets me kick myself down and when I don’t believe in myself, he always believes in me 🙂 so yeah this is gonna sound cheesy to a lot of you but thanks love, i’m glad I have you…….and with that one I say hope you all enjoy the rest of your night/morning and evening ^_^

 

All The Love  ❤ ❤

~Lexa~

Push Yourself Even If You’re Not Always Feeling Hundred Percent…….

Pushing yourself can be a very hard thing to do sometimes, especially when you think you have something good and then come to the realization that you have to regroup and start again. How do I know that because I just had to do that with this blog post, I started to write about something else thinking that it went well with what I was trying to talk about, which is about pushing yourself and it turn out to be a whole different topic which I will talk about eventually (I added it as one of my blog ideas, so you’ll read about it soon maybe) but goodness I was so frustrated because of that, like imagine your writing about something and you think that it’s making sense and it’s going with the topic you’re talking about and then you look at it and it’s like NOPE TOTALLY DIFFERENT TOPIC!!………Breath in………and breath out………okay I think i’m good now, sorry about that sometimes you just have to get it out XD

ANYWAY, back to the topic of this blog which was all about what now!?……….oh right, PUSHING YOURSELF………now when it comes to pushing yourself like I was saying it’s not always easy, it can be a little hard sometimes especially when you go in and out of motivation for things, that happens to me A LOT. One day i’ll be fine and ready to go and the next I don’t want to do anything, I don’t want to be around people, I just want it to be me, my thoughts, a good youtube video and that’s it. I just want to stay to myself and not be bothered, which in all honesty is most of the time, I prefer to stay to myself and do my own thing and I only like to welcome certain people in my space and there’s nothing wrong with that at least I don’t think it is. Everyone has those kind of days it’s totally normal.

Let’s get back into things, because I just keep going off track…….pushing yourself can be hard at times and we all know we’re not gonna be able to give 100% all the time, but it’s still important to push yourself even if it’s just doing the smallest thing. As long as you’re moving and doing something that’s all that matters. However, although pushing yourself to do the smallest thing is important……..pushing yourself to do things that you aren’t too keen about is what i’m talking about, now you don’t have to do super big things but say for example: You’re interested in starting a blog like this one, but you’re not sure if you’re gonna be the best blogger or you want to sing at that talent show you got going on in your school, but you’re worried that you’re not good enough and you start to remember I don’t like crowds so i’ll just sit this one out (i’ve been there) or 3rd option you want to start a gaming or regular youtube channel, but you’re not sure where to start or are worried people aren’t gonna like your content. No matter which one it is, if it’s something you want to try and you think hey this could be fun maybe i’ll give it a shot, go for it even if you aren’t sure where it’s gonna take you, just go for it.

Don’t be afraid to give something a shot if it interest you. If you push yourself to at least try and just see how it is who knows how far you can go with it, also remember that whatever you try, it may not always go in the direction you like at first and that’s okay not everything is gonna go according to plan right away. Things take time to grow, but as long as you work hard and push yourself in a healthy way (don’t push yourself too hard, trust me it doesn’t end well, you’ll just end up running yourself into the ground and you never want to do that) just work hard and do everything you can to push yourself and continue to grow whatever it is that you want to grow, even if you’re not a 100% sure it’s gonna go well, as long as you just start somewhere and you keep going with it, depending on if it’s something you really want to go with, then you will go far and things will start to present it’s self to you and you’ll be happy that you never gave up on what you started with.

Alrighty then well that’s all from me tonight, I started writing this early in the morning but what I was talking about at first didn’t go with the topic I was talking about, sooooo I had to regroup and start again and I just really hope that everything i’ve written here made sense and goes with the title of this blog post, let’s hope it does because I really tried to have it make sense. Anyway I hope you all have a lovely night/morning/evening. It’s late here close to 11pm so i’m gonna get some sleep not now, but in a bit haha.

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~

 

P.S. I forgot to say, I just realized i’ve been blogging for a week now and that made me happy knowing that and yeah I wanted to share that ^_^ also it’s close to midnight now i’m going.