Portals With Feelings Of Connection…

Happy Saturday to you all, it feels a little odd, yet not that odd to be writing again on here, I kinda feels like I haven’t left, but I know that it’s been a bit of a while since i’ve been here as well, now the title of this post might be a little weird to most of you, but it’s based around some dreams I had and these dreams are a little hard to not only explain, but to look towards the meaning of as well, believe me I tried to looking them up, but I could never figure out how to word them so what’s the next best thing!?

I write about them!! I won’t go into the fullness of the dream, mainly because I don’t quite remember everything from it, but for the parts I do remember, i’m going to try and share them in the best way that I can. We’ll start with the portal part of the title, it’s a little weird so we’ll get that out the way first…..part of me thinks that it came off of inspiration from a show that i’ve gotten into, that show being Once Upon A Time!! In case some of you know the show and haven’t gotten around to watch it, I will not spoil, there will be non of that here…for those that don’t know about it, the show is based off fairytale stories turned into Disney movies,

with a good amount of twists added, along with a few tales from nursery rhymes as well! It’s a pretty good show, on the second season of it now, but that aside….I feel my dream, that part of the dream, came from the show….I guess there’s small spoilers, a portal is involved at least in the last episode that I watched, but that’s all I will say, in case some of you are interested in checking it out! I’m not sure why I had a dream where a portal was in it, but who said dreams were easy to figure out!? In the dream the portal was made of water and it was like there was a hole within the ground, but at an angle it was the weirdest thing!!

In this part of the dream I was going into this portal I guess to get someone….but what was odd with this portal is that it didn’t really take long to get to wherever I was going, it was literally like a step in, kinda like a door, you go in and there you are, also this portal was outside within nature, now in this moment i’ve gone into this water portal and it’s lend me to a new part of the dream and this part of the dream, I see a gate and on the other side of the gate was a man and a little boy, the person I was with trying for us to not be seen just yet, at least that’s the feeling I get from this dream, we’re not in a place out of the ordinary, we’re actually in like a park area or I guess you can say more like an open field park type area with a wooden treehouse near ones that you build it was like a balcony…

I also feel there was a lake on the other side, further away, overhead, I was also talking to somebody and then out of nowhere a dog shows up, a big brown dog barking with it’s paw on the wooden railing like part of this treehouse and his leg paws standing, this dog later jumped off it, it wasn’t all that high don’t worry then it came towards me and the person still barking, but I felt calm with it, it never attacked us though it just barked and then out of nowhere this older guy shows up, trying to get the dog to bark more as if he wanted the dog to do something, after a while awhile the dog came closer me and I gave it a pet and then it was calm and for some reason the guy looked a bit upset about that, it was weird…..but that’s that part of my dream

The other part which won’t be as long comes more from different things and is more feeling based than anything, I saw myself painting like first person, so here’s the painting, I see the painting, kind of thing…and it was like the closer I got to painting more i’d get this feeling of where things started to make sense, like when you’re actually getting something and this isn’t the first time it’s happened, i’ve been having these kind of dreams where this feeling has been coming quite often lately to me, i’ve also had this happen with me playing one of my favorite games within my dreams, as i’m planning what I have in mind to do with it in my dream,

That feeling of “i’m getting it” comes back, I don’t know how to explain it other than everything feels like it’s piecing together and connecting in the way it’s supposed to and that is what I mean with the other part of the title, i’m not really sure why, but i’ve been having these feelings and weird dreams for some time now and I find myself trying to understand it, by going back into those dreams and seeing what else I can see to help me get it better, but maybe it’s for a reason that I shouldn’t question and that will soon later make sense!!

P.S. I also got to have a conversation with one of my favorite musicians, which was awesome….I just wish I could remember these conversation, that I have with the people I talked to in these weird dreams, it might help a bit….

All The Love ❤ ❤

Lexa

Hiii…..Happy Late New Yeeear Along With All The Other Holiday’s Prior!!

Alright let’s get this all out of the way without being awkward about it!! I’ve been gone for quiiite a while now as most or some may have noticed, my last post was back in October of last year, but as we all know we’re now in the year of 2021, it’s a bit crazy when you think about it I know!! Now we are in mid January close to moving to a New month, but we’ve still got a couple more days to this month before we transition over to that month so don’t go worrying too much about it!!

You might be wondering why i’ve been away for quite some time and the truth to that is……there was nothing for me to bring here…..I didn’t have much to say…..i’ve been also trying to figure out a lot of things in terms of not just new ideas, but I wanted to bring for myself, now whether that makes sense or not is to tell…..I didn’t feel happy with a lot of things, as much as I tried to share here, nothing ever felt important to share and because of that…..I just felt like I needed to step back from the things that I was doing within that time.

There was a lot of sorting that was needed from me and I felt and knew that, i’d like to say that i’ve sorted it all and i’m all good to go, but the truth is that’s not the case lol, there are still things that i’m working on, but from where I was and where i’m at now i’ve gotten a bit better that i’ve had the most trouble with, that aside I do still feel like I have a bit more to go before i’d say i’m at least 80-95% good!! 100% is a little too high right now for me to rate, but i’m in no rush to get to that percentage if i’m being honest I know i’ll get there eventually!!

In terms to how i’m feeling, obviously you have your days, that’s just part of being human, but for the most part i’d say i’ve been pretty alright, I feel good, but not GOOD with capital letters, it’s a little hard to explain,

I guess it’s kinda like a temperature thermostat, but instead of it telling you where you’re at on a hot/cold scale, it tells you where you’re at on a feeling scale and mine is at pretty alright/good, pretty alright is the middle and good (lower case letters) is just above it!! That’s where i’m at right now overall, which is good for me for now, I still worry about a lot of things that’s never going to change, but i’ve been slowly trying to embrace things more which is still new to me, but i’ve gotten better at it that I can say!!

I like to say that i’m still a work in progress, but slowly, yet surely I feel myself getting there little by little and i’m happy with myself about that, I still feel scared a lot of time with not really knowing where i’m going next, but that’s a fear within me that i’m doing my best to get over, I have been thinking of ideas where I have in mind of heading next, it’s something I have yet to try, but it’s something that has caught my interest and once I sort that all out i’ll speak of it more later down the line of course….

I do have another idea in mind that i’m probably going to try to mix in with my other idea, however this idea is one i’ve already had in my head for a while now…..again still have to sort it out first, obviously i’ll be doing it one by one because that’s the only way i’ll be able to fully give attention to it, but that’s just the half of it kinda….i’ve already written down slight notes to what I have in mind so i’d have an idea of how to do it, but because it’s something new and something that i’ve yet to try, I get nervous about it not knowing how it’s going to be, but if i’ve learned anything lately it’s to just let things happen when they happen and try not to think about it too much….which is something i’m still getting used as you can tell ha……

I’m sure once I get there, everything will just come through right then there, I just have to not think too much on it and let myself explore and figure it out on the way as scary as it may be and all, I just have to keep my focus on one thing at a time and know that everything else will follow along in the time that it’s supposed to. Excited, yet terrified in a good way of course!! I hope you all have been well and that this year has been treating you well, if you too are still on the journey of discovery of ones self,

know that no matter how worried you may be or how scared you may be…….it’s okay to feel that way….just take it one by one and whatever moment you’re in right now, embrace it and let it lead you somewhere you’d never think of going, in someway it’s bound to surprise you with where it takes you and wherever that may be….I wish you all the best on your adventures ^_^ Happy New Year and here’s to unexpected journey’s!!

All The Love ❤ ❤

Lexa

October Rain

It probably seems a little odd that i’m finally writing about the month of October when it’s pretty much halfway finished, I mean Halloween is literally around the corner now, but whether you noticed or haven’t really noticed, it’s been three weeks today since my last post so I figured,

Well more like felt I need to write something, do I know what this post is going to be about!? Not really at this point i’m just writing and seeing what comes out, I was trying to figure out what would be a good topic to write on,

but yeah thinking on that i’d be stuck on it all day so that’s why i’m just writing, trying to not think on it so much……if you’re wondering on the title well we’ve been having a lot of rain lately this month and so I figured, perfect title!!

These days i’ve been finding myself away from my computer and so that’s kinda why I haven’t been writing as much, also I haven’t really had a lot of things i’ve wanted to talk about which is also the reason I haven’t written in a while, October has been pretty alright i’d say, i’ve gone to appreciate this month a little, October might be the month of horror, which isn’t my favorite kind of thing, but that aside it’s been pretty alright nonetheless

I’ve been on a small amount of adventures sorta, if you want to count what my definition of adventures are, it probably wouldn’t be called adventures to you, but to me they are, i’ve slightly embraced certain things I normally wouldn’t quite go with and I guess that’s good, it might not mean much to most of you, but for me this month has invited me to enjoy and kinda go with whatever the day has in mind and I appreciate it……

Some days aren’t always full of it, but when they are, i’ve had a good time when in the moment of course and I guess when in those moments that’s all you can ask for, enjoying what life wants you to see, in the moments that you’re seeing them, but that’s my October post, sorry if it’s a short one….

Hope you all are enjoying your day and having a good one!!

All The Love ❤ ❤

Lexa

Colors Of September….

It’s now both the beginning of a new season and the ending of a month, which is September……I feel like this month went by quite quickly yet at the same time I remember when it first arrived, goodness……I feel like I don’t have a lot of words today…..at least with writing a post, on a brighter note, one of the best things with this month is the different colors of the leaves

I just think they’re really pretty and sometimes you come across unique ones or at least some that catch your eye……i’m not really sure how to feel knowing that we’re literally on the last day of this month, I was thinking of that when I went outside for some fresh air earlier this morning, normally I feel like the other months were taking their time, but this month i’m not sure, I mean it arrived and now it’s going……I guess this month has always been like that, but maybe i’m just noticing it!? Maybe it’s just me.

September……to describe it I can’t, I just know it’s the month that brings us the colors that the trees soon take on as well as a whole new season that’s been a little indecisive on what kind of weather it wants to be, sometimes it’s hot, sometimes rainy and stormy leaving wondering how you oughta dress for it…….I think fall in general may just be that way……but yeah….

September was here and now we’ll be welcoming the month known as October a.k.a. the “Spoopy” month, I know it’s Spooky, but some people call it that and I like it, not sure if it’s spelled the way I have it, but still I like it!! Just so you know, i’ve never really been a fan of the Halloween month, so with October literally arriving later tonight……i’m not sure what it’s going to be like, it might just be how it normally is, but also different I feel just based on the way the year has gone, we’ll have to wait and see on that won’t we!?

Let’s just hope it all turns out okay…..

All The Love ❤ ❤

Lexa

In The Tune Of Fall….

Hiya i’m sure you all have noticed, but in case this weather is giving you some mixed feelings, we’ve now entered a new month and we’ll soon be entering a new season as well, it’s a little crazy that we’re already in the month of September it feels like for a while we were in the Summer months for quite some time, but once August came around things started speeding up just a little bit, however just like all the other months we’re having to say see you the next time around and get used to the colder months now.

Now I gotta say, i’m kinda a little happy that we’re getting into the more colder part of the months, mainly with the fall, not so much winter, although I may have been born in the Springtime, I do really enjoy the months of Autumn, I can’t really tell you why, but fall has always been my second favorite season, I just really love the look and feel of it, you know!?

Spring is great too, I mean that’s the season I was born in so I have to make sure to give it some kinda of love, but there’s just something about fall that I can’t quite explain, maybe it’s the way the leaves change color or just the aura of it, if seasons have aura’s that is, who knows really, for all I know I could just be talking nonsense, but nonetheless it’s still great!!

Summer however was…..well I guess you can say that it had its moments, I won’t say it was the best summer, but I won’t go putting it down either, to be fair, i’ve never really been all that into the summer, so there’s not really much to say when it comes to it, summer and I…..we’ll just have to always agree to disagree, it’s not that it’s a bad season, just not mine……

Fall on the other hand, love it!! I can’t tell you what exactly i’m expecting to happen with it, so I guess i’ll just have to do my best to embrace it as best as I can with whatever it chooses to bring along…..if I had to describe what fall is like…..i’d say it’s both deep thinking and curious, but it also give you that sense of something that you just can’t quite grasp if that makes sense, you can take on that what you will, hopefully whatever you feel fall to be for you is something that is good and worth to be the season that it is…..

All The Love ❤ ❤

Lexa

2 Years Of Blogging (Part 3)

Alright so this will be the 3rd and final part to my 2 years of blogging, I did originally write something already, but I haven’t yet posted it and i’m not sure if i’m going to post it, so whatever this post turns out to be this will be the part 3 of it, now in case you’re wondering what the other one was about, I was pretty much just about not really having a theme for this blog, it was kinda what I had already written within the second part to this and it’s kinda why i’ve not shared it yet, I didn’t want it to sound like I was repeating myself, even though it felt like I was so yeah……

I’m not really sure where I want to start on this third part, I probably could’ve left it at 2 parts, but in the moment of writing the second part of this post, I did feel like I had more I wanted to say and I thought it would’ve been too long of a post to say whatever it was I was going to say within two parts and so that’s why I said i’d make a third part to this…….

This blog really doesn’t have a theme with it as i’ve already stated this is just a place of expression, be it serious or just because I really want to talk and share something here, I feel like i’ve gone from writing whatever to really thinking of what I want to bring to this blog and so I guess that’s why I have all these different sections/categories for things, I want to always keep it interesting, even though i’m not actually sure what part of my posts you guys enjoy, sometimes you really don’t know what people are going to be interested in and so I find that when you just go with something just to see if it’ll stick I guess you can say or not, it can really be of help……

To be honest I never actually know what I want to bring to this blog, I just go with what feels right in the moment even if I may not always feel 100% about those ideas……with blogging there have been posts that i’ve written to where I thought “I probably shouldn’t have wrote that” and there have been some where I wasn’t sure if I should’ve written them, but found that it ended up working someway……it’s weird you know!?

With blogging/writing really one thing I like about it is that you can express however you want, it doesn’t have to be specific, I feel it’s easy if you don’t think too hard about it, you can just go with what feels right to you in the moment and if you ever want to change it up later, you can, at first for me it was to say what I felt I couldn’t at the time, now, when I look at it, I think how should I express today!? Most of the time, it turns out to be random, but I still have moments where I want to express on something that’s a little more deeper and kinda serious…….if you’re thinking of starting a blog,

but you don’t know where to start, maybe you’re not sure what theme you want if your a theme person, just go with what feels good to you in the moment, it doesn’t need to be specific, sometimes you find what your theme is a little later, maybe you’re not meant to have theme and you’re just suppose to go with it……inspiration strikes when you least expect it so until then just go with the feeling and see what comes out from it, because you never know what could work, but I do have to thank this blog for giving me a place to express when I felt I couldn’t at one point, if i’m being honest,

Having this blog, really did help me to express more and it’s for that reason that I guess I still have it and why i’ll do my best to stick to it, even when there are days where I have no inspiration or just don’t feel like writing, i’ll still have it, because I know that eventually there’s going to be something that I will want to share and I know this will be the place i’ll come to, to do that…..but to wrap this post up I just want to say thank you to those who have been apart of my blogging experience and for those who have just arrived and if you were here, but aren’t anymore, thank you as well for taking that time and being here for the moments that you were here for.

For those still apart of my journey here, I hope I can continue to bring you guys posts that you find interesting and some that you may find help at times, however you have enjoyed, I hope you continue to enjoy and all that in between, I think that’s all I have to say, if you read all of this to the end thank you and if not, it’s fine, I just wanted to express my thank you’s and that, but I hope you all are having a nice day and are doing well,

If you haven’t read the first and second part to this post, you can find them both here, you all take care and i’ll see you in the next one:

2 Years Of Blogging (Part 1)

2 Years Of Blogging (Part 2)

All The Love ❤ ❤

Lexa

2 Years Of Blogging (Part 2)

Hiya, hope you’re all doing well, I know it’s been a week now since my first part of this post, I have been meaning to write the second part to it, but I didn’t want to write it, until I knew I felt good enough to write it and so that’s why it’s taking me a bit to get to this post, I didn’t want to rush it by any means……now to be completely honest…….

Where this post is going I don’t know, i’m kinda just going to go with it, it might just be a theme here now that i’m thinking about it, but let’s just see where this post chooses to travel…..okay so I know I didn’t quite go into details of what 2 years of blogging has felt like or has been in the first part of it…….and to share some thoughts on that part…….i’m not really sure what to express on what it’s been like…….when I first started this blog, it was to have it be a place where I felt I could express myself, there was no theme at all to it, it was just a blog of expression, however I felt I tried to express

myself in the best way that could……for while I feel like I did that okay if that makes sense!? To be fair I still consider this to be my blog of expression, there have been times where I tried to come up with a theme…..and I always had trouble with that…..

You see although I can theme certain things out…..blogging was one of those things I found hard to give a theme to…….there were many times where i’d worry and go into overthink mode wondering if I was doing all of this right or not and i’d even stress myself out about it and sometimes it’ll get to a point where I would stop writing for a while and i’d go back and fourth with myself on whether I should continue with this blog, you know the natural worries when it comes to having a blog and that……

There were times where i’d notice i’d write about anything whether it made sense or not, just because I felt I needed to post all the time and I guess doing that probably didn’t help creativity wise……let’s just say there’s a lot i guess I can talk on……that’d make it a very long post ha!! One of the main things though was, I made this blog to have as an outlet to express when I didn’t feel I was able to in the way I wanted to,

but even then I still felt it hard to express at times……when it comes to personal things even though i’ll express on it to an extent……you’ll never see me go into full details to whatever i’m expressing about and i’m detailed person irl (in real life) by the way, but if it’s too personal, although I won’t say exactly what it is about, i’ll still express on what i’m feeling just differently……that said, there were moments where I stopped expressing because I didn’t want it to come across a certain way…….yet I knew I had things I wanted to share that was kind of personal that I wanted to get out

Again it’s actually quite a lot now that i’m writing about it, there might just be a part 3 here……if so it’ll be shorter in words, but these 2 years on this blog well they’ve been something and by something I mean a mixture of different emotions and thoughts and all that jazz, again i’ll shorten it in the next part, I didn’t think there’d be so much expression happening to describe blogging for two years, but here we are, i’m going to try and make this 3rd and last post part the overall view of having this blog shorter

There’s still some stuff I want to express on because I don’t feel this to be finished so, I hope you all enjoy this second part in someway and if you haven’t read the first part you can find it here: 2 Years Of Blogging (Part 1)

To be continued and finished……

All The Love ❤ ❤

Lexa

Be Prepared…..

Before we start going on with this topic first i’d like to give it a bit of light by saying that this title, is also a song title, from one of my favorite movies the Lion King, I wrote it out and thought of the song because yeah I just did!!

Now this may get serious, but it may not, i’m not really sure how i’m expecting this post to go and maybe I don’t need to, so i’m just going to let it flow out how it’s wanting to……they say it’s important to be prepared always, yet at times there are moments that even when you think you’re prepared, there’s always a chance something’s going to end up catching you off guard……no matter how many times you may do your best to make sure

You’re not missing something, a lot of those times you may because you can’t be prepared for everything, sometimes a lot of the things that happen, comes from it being unexpected and yeah not knowing what to expect can get stressful and there’s going to be moments where you may get frustrated or angry even, but when we start to feel those emotions……we have to keep in mind that it’s not going to always be something we can control.

Things happen and sometimes even when you’re prepared, it doesn’t mean that you’re always going to be fully prepared, prepared……maybe that doesn’t make much sense…..but what i’m trying to get at is……even when things seems to be a little out of control……be prepared for the moments that you’re not prepared for, it’s like that saying expect the unexpected….

A lot of the time we don’t know a lot that is going to happen, but it doesn’t mean that we can’t always suit up for it in the best way possible, we may not know what’s to come, but we have to believe that whatever it is, it’ll be good in someway and who knows it may just be the very thing that we’ve been looking for without realizing or most likely something we didn’t see coming that we didn’t even think about in the first place!!

When we least expect it, we will soon find or come across something that might just be hard to explain at this moment, but will soon make much more sense to where we know and feel it to be just that thing that we needed……it’s all about patience and trusting the process that whatever is coming, we may not always be entirely prepared, but for the most part we’re still prepared in a way, though there’s times we don’t always expect it.

All The Love ❤ ❤

Lexa

2 Years Of Blogging (Part 1)

So this might be a few days late, but I did want to write something for my 2 year anniversary of starting this blog……not really sure what i’m going to write, you may not even see this until a little later, but I just wanted to get at least some of my thoughts down just so I have at least an idea of it.

To start, in case some of you are wondering, this past Saturday (July 11th) made two years since I went and created this blog, as well as something else, it was a bit of an event kind of day, but nonetheless, for the most part it was the anniversary of my blog…..now I knew the anniversary was coming up and leading up to it, I was trying to think of what I could talk about or what kind of things I wanted to share on that day……as you can tell,

I didn’t end up really sharing much the day of the anniversary, I ended up doing some other stuff and by the time I finished, I didn’t have time to share on anything and to be honest……I didn’t really know what I wanted to share or talk about, motivation, as well as inspiration has been a little…..

Dimmed these days……that being said, even though I didn’t really have much planned for my 2 year anniversary of the blog……I still wanted to try and do something for it, even if it was just me saying “It’s been 2 years can you believe it!?” on the note…..it’s kinda a little surprising that i’ve had this for that long and that i’m still using it actually……it’s slightly like “wow” but also not at the same time, I can’t really explain it…..still though also you may have noticed, I wrote part 1 to this post, Reason being!?

I feel like there’s more I want to say and I don’t know if i’ll be able to put it all in this post, again i’m not quite sure what those things are just yet, I just feel I want to express some other stuff if that makes sense!? Now I know this post isn’t really all that long, but I know that if I go and write whatever it is I feel I want to express on, it’ll start to become quite lengthy and so i’d rather have it be not that short, but not that long either sort of a post and have it be a part 1 than continue on and have it be a little too much to read.

To be fair when I get to the second part to this and I will, i’m not really sure what it’s going to be about, but I want to make sure that I get my thoughts out in the best way possible which is why i’m going to take my time with it a little so that way whatever what’s to come out, will and hopefully it’ll make sense in the process, who knows that might end up being the longer post for all I know, hopefully not, but if it is it was already kinda stated beforehand, I do my best to keep it semi short and not have it ramble on, but for now…..i’ll leave you with part 1 of 2 years of blogging!!

All The Love ❤ ❤

Lexa

You Were Here…..

How to start this…….you were here……you were here yesterday with me……you might’ve also been hanging around in general, but I knew that I wasn’t going crazy and today proved it right with your little paw prints appearing all over the place……but I knew you were with me yesterday at first I thought I was just over my head and that it was just me,

but nope it was you, you were here and for a good while too at that, you stayed with me, sure you went in and out a few times, but you always came back for a bit and when you did, you always sat right next to me even when I moved about, wherever I went you laid next to me……I know you eventually left though, but within the moments that you were around

I was happy and glad that you had visited and I made sure to appreciate your presence for the time you were here for…….i’m not really sure where you entered first, but I guess that’s not all that important, all that matters is that you were here and you let me know you were here and for that i’m happy……I miss you everyday my crazy girl, thank you for coming by to visit and for spending some time with me in the process……

It was good to have you around again, even if it was only for the moment. I’m sure you’ll make your presence known again when you’re not busy doing whatever you’re doing, be it running around, driving people nuts or just being peanut haha, you know i’ll keep looking for you, but until then……I’m glad to know you’re doing okay and are well, I love you and I look forward to your next visit, be good and try not to cause too much trouble alright!!

All The Love ❤ ❤

Lexa