You ever have a moment to yourself where you’re just thinking about a lot of different things and you don’t know why, but little by little certain things start to become clearer to you for some reason, i’m not really sure how to explain what I mean exactly, I can try and bring you into my mind so you can see what i’m talking about, but I don’t even know if i’ll be able to explain what i’m talking about in the way that I want, but i’m gonna try and layout it out for you guys as best as I can. Okay so where do I start……..uhhhh so I was writing a different blog post on not really knowing what to write because I was having trouble writing at first and I got a pretty decent way with it, not too far but a few 100 words actually it was along this paragraph here only shorter (149 words to be exact, we’re at 164 words here and counting as i’m writing this lol)

Anyway so I was writing a different blog post at first and then my mind took a smooth turn and I stopped writing that blog post and I just started thinking about a lot of things, while I was thinking I started looking into the sky out my window and it was kinda dark, possibly because it was going to rain, but it still hasn’t rained yet, it’s hard to say whether or not it will because the weather here has been Sunny then dark, then Sunny again and then dark once more and so i’m not sure what the weather has in store for us today, but yeah going back to what I was talking about……..I was looking at the sky, just staring out my window, trying to figure out what I should write about and I couldn’t think of anything, so I went to grab one of my journals where I write blog post ideas, I don’t really have a lot of ideas just about 15-16 i’d say (just checked 17 actually) so I looked for a blog post idea in my journal and I saw one that caught my eye and I picked it, the title of the blog post idea I was going to write about was called, finding your path in life and although i’m not really writing about that blog post I picked to write about, it did have me thinking.

Remember when I talked about Finding My Niche, if you don’t you can read it here if you like Finding My Niche (My Confidence Struggle Story) it’s just all about finding my thing in writing and also talking about my struggle to find confidence in myself from time to time. Going back to what I was talking about……..so I wrote about finding my niche with writing before and believe me i’m happy that I started this blog because i’m able to write down my feelings and share my thoughts with all of you as well, but I had this thought come in my mind and I always find myself going back to all the things I use to do that also brought joy to me before starting this blog and I can’t help but think that maybe I have more than just one niche you know!? Hear me out, so we all have something in us that speaks to us more then other things and everyone has a special or hidden talent that they become interested in.

People who were born with a talent or find a thing that speaks to them, obviously they go after that thing they enjoy, because it brings them happiness and there’s just something about it that gives them that feeling of finally belonging somewhere and so when they find that passion that calls to them, you know they’ll become a force to be reckon with, because they have so much passion, I’m not sure if any of what i’m saying is making any sense but i’m just trying to gather my thoughts and bring to you what it is i’m thinking. What i’m trying to say is I feel like I don’t really have a specific passion for anything, the closest thing to a passion that I have is maybe writing due to the fact that I write a lot and I enjoy writing, but when it comes to passion and what I love the most, I can never just chose one thing all the time, I’m always switching it up from time to time.

I just feel this thing in me where, I go back and think maybe I should try this again and speaking of trying something again, I feel like I should go back and give Youtube another try, because i’m starting to miss it, I really am…….I miss sitting in front of the camera and talking about something I love or am interested in and talking non stop about it to the point where I get so lost in what i’m saying, i’ll get distracted and then lose my train of thought and then go on to a different topic and just talk about that. I miss being able to talk about the things I once enjoyed like wrestling, a lot of you don’t know this, but I LOOOOVE watching wrestling and then talking about the matches and who I think should get more of an opportunity and ranting about certain people in wrestling (my friend ray knows who i’m talking about)

I think I now know why it is that I feel like even if I do one thing like writing for example, I love it, don’t get me wrong, I enjoy writing down my thoughts and sharing it with you guys, but I also miss talking about the things I enjoy and giving my opinion on certain topics that interest me and just having other people who too share my interest get involved as well, although there wasn’t a lot of people interacting, there was still a good amount to where we all were able to just have a good time talking about something we all enjoyed, even though wrestling nowadays isn’t the greatest I still have a love for it, I mean it’s because of wrestling that I met one of my greatest friends and my boyfriend as well. I just really miss it, because it gave me an outlet to help me kinda break out of myself and oddly enough gave me confidence that I didn’t know I had and after a while yeah I lost that confidence, because I didn’t believe in my ideas and I didn’t believe in me and I should’ve, I should have just went with my ideas even if no one liked them and it wasn’t the most popular thing, I should’ve just went with them because I liked them, I  know i’m probably getting off topic here, but I just really feel strongly about this.

I don’t have a specific passion and I always felt that, I always just went with anything that interest me and i’m at the point where I kinda want to do more then just write, I want to express myself based off my interest and share my thoughts with others and hear their thoughts too and possibly make more friends along the way, there’s nothing wrong with dabbling in more than one thing, if anything it should be something you want to do because then you’re not just limited to one thing, you can do everything and still do the thing you like best. My thing is writing, but it’s also creating and other things and I should learn to be more confidence in myself and my ideas if it’s what I like, it’s okay to like more than one thing as long as it makes you happy and you enjoy it.

If I can write everyday on here, why can’t I do videos also!? You know I have to thank writing because it showed me that i’m capable of sticking to something everyday if I put my mind to it, lets just see if I can do the same with my videos again. I also want to thank my friend Ray and my boyfriend for always being there for me and supporting me in everything that I ever wanted to do, I probably spun them around a few times trying to find something that I could finally stick with, but they never left my side even when I was a mess, they just always believed in me and support me in everything I shared with them, I couldn’t ask for better people in my life so thank you guys, also for those who support my blog and come back and read my stuff even when some are longer than others, I really appreciate you and it always means a lot to know that you enjoy my writing, just the fact that you even take the time to read it means the world so thanks.

That’s all I have for today, I hope you don’t mind this being too long, I just felt I needed to share this I don’t know why, but I did……..I don’t even know what the title to this should be, I wrote this first before I wrote the title. If there’s anything to take from this blog it’s don’t worry if you don’t have a passion for something, just try everything and if you still don’t know what it is you want to do, just do all the things that make you happy and go with that, just promise that when you try everything that interest you, you take a necessary break from it when you need to, remember not to stretch too thin for something, go with what you can handle and isn’t too overwhelming, if you want to add something new, make sure to look at all the things your doing and whatever you find yourself not really taking interest to anymore get rid of that and add a new interest.

Lastly always and I mean always believe in your ideas and yourself, don’t worry about whether someone will like it or not, if you feel good about it and you’re happy with it then do it and if there’s an idea that you tried and you know isn’t really working much for you anymore then it’s okay to let it go and come up with other ones you feel will work for you and with that, I hope you all have a goodnight/morning and or evening 🙂

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~