Acceptance Of The Old Or Of The New!? (July 6, 2019)

I’ll be honest, this title is stumping me a little on how i’m going to write about this, even though I titled it this way, there’s always something that is going to be a little of your comfort level, but sometimes you have to try even if you aren’t sure on how it’ll go or sound in this case.

Sometime we accept certain things that we shouldn’t and push away things that can be too much to take in because it evolves changing the things we are already used to, even if those things may be good for us in the long run.

In this case we talk on the topic of change and new beginnings for something better and different…….the word different is something a lot of us don’t like really like to embrace, because it secretly has the word change, hidden within it which makes us want to run and hide from it.

Not everyone likes change as we all know, even if it’s the good kind, we prefer comfort and not having to change anything around us, we see it as why change something when there’s nothing wrong with it!? However even though it may not look like it from the surface, doesn’t mean that there’s nothing wrong hidden deep down inside…….

The insane part about it is that most of the time we know that we’ve grown or are growing out of the comfort of what we know, yet we choose to stay and continue living in the mentally discomfort of our own ways and or bad habits and lifestyle we try to keep around, knowing that it’s harmful to the growth of ourselves and personality, but we accept it thinking that we need to, when in reality it’s not an obligation to do so……we forget that as human beings we’re meant to evolve and change every now and again.

Even if we have things to us that stay the same, it doesn’t mean we fully are the same person, we change a little everyday and our perspectives on things change as well just like everything else to us…..

We may not like it, but it’s something that we have to let happen otherwise, we’re just going to be miserable and that is nothing, but the truth, the more we hold back on something that is natural to our human nature, the more we’ll continue to regret and become unhappy and we all know that regret is the one thing that we don’t want eating us alive mentally, because even when you think you’ve gotten over something, you’ll find that you really haven’t, it’s always there hidden in your mind even if it doesn’t seem like it.

Accepting something because we think we have to or because we’re used to it, will only make us angry deep under the surface and the more we continue adding fuel to it, the more we’ll start to resent and break and when we start to break everything around us starts collapsing……

Worrying about how people will feel, the way everything will go or even about other peoples lives, only adds stress to the person worrying no one else, it might worry others (people you’re close to) but it won’t do as much damage to them then it will to you and that’s because you’re the one feeling it the most which is why you stress out more, when in reality the only thing that is needed for you to focus on, is yourself in regards to the kind of change you want for you and what you’re willing to accept in your life.

If you accept what is already given, not just with other people, but with yourself and the way things are going in your life depending on whether you’re okay with it or not will depend on the way it makes you feel, if you feel good about it than, there’s no need to worry, but if deep down you’re not willing to accept it than, that should say something clearly……

Although we surround ourselves with different people and different things, we are the ones that have to be satisfied with what we bring and allow in our lives otherwise who’s the happy one!? If it’s not us we’ve done things wrong, we shouldn’t allow nor accept something just because we’re used to it or we feel we have to, not from other people, not even from our scared self, acceptance of the old shouldn’t go clashing with things that are new…..

If anything the old and new should come together in some way, because they’re just as tied together as anything else, we don’t have to get rid of what we already have, but we don’t have to just accept it either, keep what you have, but try to embrace what you can have to,

Even if you are unsure of it, you don’t want to be stuck with a routine that is draining and unfulfilling, accepting where you are and what is expected will only drive you up the walls, instead of being afraid and anxious of a new and most likely better change, try being anxious, but excited for it!!

I mean let’s face it no one is ever calm with new things and if you are, well than I don’t know how that’s possible, but I guess it can happen…….but new things should always bring you a little excitement even when it’s terrifying, I mean if you’re not scared a little, do you even really care!? Be anxious and scared, but be excited a little too, because acceptance of the old should never keep you from accepting what is new…..

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~

Action……

So I tried to write a poem on the word action and I couldn’t really think of anything so I ended up writing a different one. Action……….I don’t know what exactly it is about the word, but for some reason I can’t help, but feel a little nervous with it and I know that sounds silly, because who would be nervous just seeing the word action, it’s just a word right!?

Yes and no, it’s a bit of both really, most people wouldn’t mind the word overall, it’s a form of productivity, you know getting things done and everything, so why can it make us feel nervous or scared!? Why does it tend to make us freeze or frantic about sometimes!? If I had the answer i’d tell you, believe me I would, but i’m not really sure about it myself……….

I guess when it comes to it the whole phrase “Actions speaks louder than words” it can leave you feeling this pressure which can cause you to want to either go into frantic mode or panic mode. This may sound very silly, but as i’m writing this i’m actually feeling a little anxious, makes no sense I know, but that’s an example of when I say it can it can leave you feeling pressured.

It doesn’t matter whether we’re up and moving with it or not, we’ll always have some kind of pressure added with it and that’s because we naturally put pressure on ourselves. Some of us put too much pressure and some of us find a way to add the right amount of pressure that’s needed, how I have no idea, I guess it’s just because some of us are better at handling pressure.

I’m not really the best under pressure though, I always tend to beat myself up when it comes to things in general, so when i’m already doing that and there’s more pressure added to that, it just makes things worst and believe me sometimes I wish I wasn’t so bad under pressure, but because I know that I am, i’m trying to keep myself calm and not get so worked up easily.

I also know that when it comes to action, I panic before the whole action part and I don’t understand why that always happens with me, but it does, I have ideas and sometimes it’ll take a while for me to actually go through with them………..it’s just a lot of things I guess I don’t know………….i’m not really sure where it started, where I started being afraid of taking action!?

It’s weird because, i’ve been going back into my mind, thinking about the times where action wasn’t a problem, i’m trying to figure out when exactly it happened to where I started going more and more into myself, wanting to understand why I have so much trouble with going fourth with certain things and why i’m always thinking about things too much!?

Why is action always a brick wall in my mind!? I don’t really know why and I don’t think I should ask why, the action part of me I know has to come out eventually and the part that likes to sit and do a deep analyze on whether I should or not, needs to come up with something, patience with a little assertiveness added, might just be the trick to keep the pressure balanced.

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~

Simple.

You know although the word itself is simple, it doesn’t always mean that everything else is going to be simple along with it. I talked about balance in my last post and how trying to find a balance for everything isn’t always easy, that also goes with wanting things to be simple, as much as a lot of us may try and create a simple life, we also know that, that’s not always the way it’s going to go, especially when you’ve been around busy, stressful and overwhelming things.

Is it possible to be and live simple!? Yeah I believe it is, but it’s all about the way you do it though i’d say…………….if you’re use to the whole chaotic and fast pace lifestyle then, simple is going to feel like a task to get into and with all these habits that we already have within us, it’ll definitely feel like being on a whole different planet. When it comes to all things simple, it seems like it would be hard, but it’s really not, it all really depends on whether you want things to be simple or not, if you want things to be a little more calmer and less hectic or if you just prefer to be stressed out all the time and not get that moment of breath that you probably are needing.

I use to always think a lot was what was better, i’m sure that you guys probably think that or have thought that as well, but when you really think about it, having a lot is actually the opposite in my opinion, when you not only are dealing with a lot and complicating a situation or thought it just ends up bringing more stress and feelings of pressure, same as if you owned a lot of things, sure it may look nice and everything, but having a whole lot around you, especially when you’re trying to stay calm and deal with things the simple way, you find that can have an affect in someways.

I think with simple, everyones definition for it differs, I feel if things were too simple, it might leave you bouncing off the walls, but I also know that if things are too hectic it will drive you up the walls as well………..so i’m thinking that maybe, with simple, there has to be a balance with it, so however you make simple work for you, then I guess things will be fine, i’d say it’s a little simply complicated, but not too complicated I guess………

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~

Jan 14, 2019

Todays a bit of weird day, a lot is going on, but not with me, however I have been thinking on a lot of different things today, i’ve also done a little bit of worry about certain things………………there’s just so much happening all at once and you think that you’re able to handle everything until you finally realize that you can’t handle everything as much as you thought you could. I’m just hoping for everything to finally have a complete balance this time, everything is just so out of order that no matter how much you try to make sure everything is in it’s right place, eventually it’ll just end up becoming a mess again.

Just a little bit more balance is all that is needed, I just want the ones I care about to be alright and happy you know!? I think that’s what we all want deep down inside, just to have those we care about well and happy, as well as ourselves happy and well too………..it can be a bit overwhelming sometimes though when you’re trying to figure out what it is you want when it comes to life and also trying to keep some sort of balance with everything else.

In those times, you wish that you had multiple versions of yourself so it wouldn’t be so much you know…………but I don’t think anyone’s created a thing where you can have multiple you’s yet, so you end having to kinda try and figure out a different way to create some kind of balance with everything you see as important or that you want to put your focus on. It’s not aways easy, but you have to say to yourself that although, we can’t seem to figure it out now, it doesn’t mean that we won’t eventually and when it comes to trying to balance everything, we won’t always be able to, but we can always try to think of something to where it doesn’t seem like too much.

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~

Jan 11, 2019

I’ve been doing a lot of deep thinking on a whole lot of different things, some which caused me to stress out when i’m mean’t to keep myself calm and others that caused me to get emotional, you see with my kind of thinking, it’s never really just thinking, it comes with a lot of thought and sometimes those thoughts have emotions attached to them………I have moments where i’m calm though, but it’s not all the time i’m like that.

I’m realizing that no matter how much you try not to stress and no matter how much you try to think calmly and not overthink things, i’d say 8/10, it’s just gonna end up happening either way, you can’t really escape stress, you can find ways to maintain it as best as you can, but they’ll always be something there to stress you out, no matter if it’s big or if it’s something small……………the worst feeling with stress though is when there’s someone you really care about going through it and you aren’t able to be there for them when they need you most, I mean you can try and help them in the best way that you can, but it’s hard when you see them really struggling and you can’t be there for them the way that you want to.

It’s not even just with stress, i’m talking about them struggling with stuff in general. It’s like you want to be there for them to help them get through it and yet it’s so hard you know!? It’s so easy to get frustrated, sad and stressed out, it shouldn’t be that easy, but it is and I think that’s because when we’re feeling those kind of emotions, we tend to put all of our energy on that side of the corner and when it comes to the feel good corner side, we may consider it, but it always seems to be a second option which I can’t seem to wrap my head around on why that is exactly…………..I don’t think we’ll ever truly understand with that.

I think the only thing you can really do when dealing with stress or any unpleasant feelings is to deal with it the best way that you can and as calmly as you can and when it comes to trying to help someone when they are going through a rough time, is to just be there for them as best as you can. You don’t always have to give advice or feel like you have to be this super person, sometimes the best thing you can do is just be there and listen to them and if you don’t have the best thing to say, that’s okay.

We shouldn’t feel bad or beat ourselves up for not always knowing what to say when it comes to trying to help someone out, as long as you’re there when they really need you or need someone to listen to them, then I think that’s all they can really ask for, just to have someone be there for them when they really need it.

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~

I Think I Got It…..

So i’ve been thinking about a lot of things and some are still being registered in my brain, but there are some things that i’m feeling good about and that i’m gonna give a try, i’m not even going to say that i’m thinking about giving it a try because then i’ll end up trying to talk myself out of it and we don’t need to always do that………..I have this idea on something that I have been tossing back and forth in my mind, trying to figure out whether I should give it a go or not, now one of the ideas within the idea I have i’m not sure about still, I think i’m going to see how I feel with it later.

As for the other option I have with the thing i’ve been thinking about for a bit, I think i’m gonna give it a shot, i’ve already tried it one way so I want to see how it could go when I try it a whole new different way. When it comes to the original way I had it, I don’t know if I still want to do it that way, like I said before if it gets the point where I feel like going back that route, then i’ll add it later, but for now i’m gonna try it differently and see what I prefer better.

I could combined it with this way, but I don’t know if I really want to do that, so that’s why I feeling like trying it a different way and if I happen to want to add that in, i’m sure I will………maybe who knows. I’m kinda excited about seeing how it goes this way, I thought about it once, but wasn’t sure with it, which for some reason that’s how I always tend to operate, but this time it has to be different, it’s either I want to try it or I don’t and I don’t want to have to keep contemplating things all the time so i’m just gonna go with it and see which one I prefer and give it a try, plus it’s something I feel I want again so i’m gonna do it and i’m gonna do my best to not stray away from it and let my fears or hesitations get in the way this time around.

The only thing is, I have a lot to catch up on and that’s gonna be something, unless I just make it simple and catch up with it in a way i’m not use to, it might save me some time and i’ll be on top of everything a little quicker……………we’ll see which one I go for.

If you guy have anything you want to share or thoughts on something, just comment them down below, i’d love to hear about it.

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~

Jan 6, 2019

Hey you guys, how’s it going!? I hope you’re doing well and enjoying the day. I’m gonna be honest I have no idea what to write about today, there aren’t any topics coming to mind that I want to talk about, not a lots going on, i’ve just been writing in my journal mainly, thinking a bit and just watching stuff………..not the most productive I know……………i’ve been trying not to stress about it though, it’s not easy when you’re not really sure what to do though. We’re almost into the middle of January which is crazy if you think about it, the year just started and it’s already starting to fly by, not too quick, but it sure is doing some speed walking, i’ll tell you that one.

I finally got past something that I was contemplating in my head about for a bit, now that i’m past it, i’m not really sure what to do next with it so there’s that………….you ever have a moment where you start to really think about something and wonder if you’re able to hold up to it!? or you think to yourself “did I make the right decision here!?” I know contemplating things all the time isn’t something you should do and i’m one to always contemplate things especially when it’s something new, I try not to, but it’s just so hard sometimes because you always want to do well with the things that you’re doing and you always hope that when you start something, that you’re not going to fall out of it you know what i’m talking about!?

I work myself up a lot with doing that sort of thing and i’m really trying to work on not having that happen every time I think about trying something new and different, I still have that thing in me though and i’m not really sure how to break out of it right away………….maybe I just need to give it some time and just kinda work through it the best way that I feel I can. I don’t want to stress myself out with this and I don’t want to have to always question everything whenever i’m interested to try something………I still find myself thinking about everything and how things will go, but this time i’m trying to keep myself from worrying about it too much and just kinda let it happen with the moment of when it happens, if that makes sense.

I really shouldn’t look too much into things, that’s only going to make me think more and the more I think the more i’ll stress myself out with everything and that’s what i’m trying to prevent from happening. There are a lot of thoughts in my head, a lot that i’m unable to randomly pick from to sort out, but this was one of the main things going around in my head…………i’m not sure where i’m going exactly, but i’m hoping that I don’t stress myself out too much this time with trying to figure it out, all I need to do is just stay calm and trust not only in myself, but also trust that i’m gonna get somewhere, I just gotta keep going even if it’s scary.

What about you guys!? Do you have anything you want to let out, if so feel free to share and comment your thoughts and feelings down below, i’d love to hear how you guys are feeling.

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~