Well June left and July has now arrived, it’s been quite a hot summer also and from the looks of it, it’s probably going to get hotter. So far it’s not that bad, let’s just hope it stays that way for a little while longer, before the heat decides to turn itself up even more! You know they say how you start the new month, will be how the rest of the month is going to feel and even though we just got to July, for me it’s already feeling quite overwhelming.

Usually I’m not great at saying exactly what i’m feeling, sometimes….well most times I express my feelings in a way where I don’t have to say much and by that I mean, I like to say what i’m feeling, without having to say how i’m feeling, not sure if that makes sense, but it’s the best way I can explain it. I’m not even sure if the overwhelming feeling is mine or if it belongs elsewhere, is it a good overwhelming feeling or is it coming from my anxiety, could it be a bit of both or all 3 wrapped in one big overwhelming ball of yarn?

I think my asking these questions, it’s allowing me to feel a bit more calmer….maybe exploring these emotions will help bring down the feelings as if there’s so much going on all at once. I guess there is a part of me that the feeling of overwhelm belongs to……i’m not going to say that much about it, but there is something that i’m excited about, but also nervous about that I’m still working on, it’s something I went to start a long time ago, but forgot about for a good while and eventually rediscovered it not even realizing and now I’m getting to a moment where I’m really trying to get it going and i’ve set some stuff up already, but I have yet to add more to it and get it ready to be revealed.

Maybe that’s a vague/ subtle explaination, but it’s more of an explaination then i’ve expected myself to even talk about, that’s how I know I’m really excited about it, it means that much to me and I guess i’m just a little worried how it’s going to be embraced and accepted, however I want to put good feelings towards it for it to thrive and bloom in a way that even I don’t expect it to! I do a lot then what people know and I’m trying to get better at telling myself that it’s okay to ask and say “Hey I really like this thing or I want for this to happen” and not feel as though i’ve not earned it.

I’m the kind of person that doesn’t really ask for much nor do I like to ask for much, I try to be greatful and appreciate everything I have already and I’ve always been that way, I’m the one who will gift people things, but won’t ask for anything in return and if I am given something it’s hard for me to take it. So this new thing I have in the “work in progress” section of my brain, it’s something new and different and I know it’s going to require me to have to talk about soon and that’s where the overwhelming part is, knowing you have something brewing and you just want for it to go well and hope that people like it, i’ve not done anything like it before so there’s a lot of emotions that come with it.

I know I just have to be confident and embrace the good feelings that could come from it, instead of worry about the other stuff and that’s going to be a bit hard for me as I worry about everything, but i’m going to try my best to get into the energy of excitement, the passion and creativity of it and let it all unfold on it’s natural time. It’s better to put yourself out there and even if it takes a while, at least you know you are doing everything you can rather than being afraid that it’s not going to go well and so you don’t do it because of that reason.

I like being creative and I’m going to choose to keep being creative even if I’m full of anxiety and nerves and just keep doing my best, I have to remember that nerves are good because it means you really care about what you’re doing. We all have our own season and for some reason Summer has chosen me, even though I’m a Spring flower person, plus it’s my birth season, I may not like the heat much, but I will try and embrace it the best I can, although a bit of cool air will do nicely!

If there’s anything each and every one of you out there have within yourself that you’ve been feeling to be calling you to do lately, I would listen to that voice, you may be like me where just the thought of it scares you a bit, but if you’re feeling more good feelings and you notice that it also makes you really happy then this is your sign to give it a go! If it’s something you feel passionate about don’t let that creative part of you fade, just trust yourself and know that whatever it is that you feel intuitive about it’s always going to bring you to places your meant to go, you just have to give it a try.

All The Love
Lex 💚💚💚