Tag: Pressure

You Can’t Hide From Yourself….

On By Daydreamer LexIn Entries, UncategorizedLeave a comment

Let’s just get it off our chest, we’re uncomfortable…..we don’t like it and we want it to stop, buut it’s not going to is it!? As humans we always think we can escape our own uncomfortability, but the one person that you’re unable to get away from is yourself so what exactly are you doing!? You want to know why I’m uncomfortable!? Well, I’ll try to explain it in a way that, hopefully doesn’t reveal to many personal details, but to keep a long story short….I’m uncomfortable with the fact that, when I’m thinking about something that I know I want to do I will take FOREVER just to decide on it, even when I know I want to do it….

However, one thing about me that I know is my least favorite trait to my personality is…..I’m always siking myself out of things or I overthink it too much to where I already know it frustrates those around me, they don’t have to say it to me because I can feel it and by knowing that, it’ll brings me more stress and frustration because you know the reason you feel like that is due to the fact that you’re afraid to let people down, which wait for it…..adds MORE stress because you’re also fighting with yourself thinking “Why are you worrying about everyone else!?”

Asking yourself that question then just makes you want to scream because although you know why you worry, part of you just wish you didn’t worry or care so much about these things…..and all of that starts mixing together because you could never put you, nor your needs and wants first, leaving you to feel a little upset with yourself, where you’re just like “You always worry about other people and how they’re going to feel” although there’s nothing wrong with caring about others and wanting to make sure they’re going to be okay….

You as person also have to know when it’s time to say “I love you, but no” and be okay with choosing to honor yourself and the things you want to go after! That being said, we also have to live and embrace the uncomfortability of it all!! No matter what we do, we will always be uncomfortable, there’s no way of escaping it, we live to experience, we live to discover and to be amazed along with all the other emotions and feelings we go through within our journey here!

We have to be uncomfortable in order to know what we’re comfortable with, once that’s discovered, we then find and learn what our comfortablities are and how to embrace them along with the uncomfortable! It’s not something we have to necessarily like feeling, but it is something we have to accept whether we want to or not! We have to be okay with the shadow parts of ourselves…..if you really think about it, we’re practically yin and yang inside, we all have the light part of us and the dark part, if we are always leaning towards the light and pushing the dark away, we’re not really giving ourselves the chance to truly experience who we are all the way around…..which isn’t fair!

Just because something is dark doesn’t mean that there isn’t any goodness to it! I may have said this before already, but we all know how diamonds are formed, they go through a lot of pressure before turning into something beautiful!! Amethyst forms from volcantic lava and pearls can be found within oysters, before stones become stones they have to go through some kind of dark experience themselves before we get to see the true beauty of them…..it’s never easy when you feel like every wall is caving in on you or where things are just not going well whatsoever, BUT it’s important to be aware that, all of it is necessary and instead of seeing it as a negative experience automatically, we have to understand that, it happens because we’re evolving and we need it in order for our growth to thrive and for us to continue to be the best versions of ourselves that we already are wheher we see it or not!

We can’t have the good without the bad, even if we prefer it better, the more we try to resist the uncomfortable the more worst and uncomfortable it’s going to get, so allow it, accept it and be okay with it, you don’t have to love it, but honestly who loves being uncomfortable!? Allow the transformation that you’re going to be experiencing to unfold and happen and be amazed at what you see!!

All The Love ❤ ❤

Lexa

Plans & Decisions…

On By Daydreamer LexIn Entries, UncategorizedLeave a comment

I’ve never been one for planning you know, which you probably do because I’ve mentioned it a few times on here, me and plans….don’t mix, however I’ve come to a point in my life where, I’m finding myself trying to plan for things which is usually not my department, but if the time has come for me to really sit and plan things properly then I’m going to do it! I’m going to put myself in an uncomfortable situation and face it the best way I can, scared and full of nerves combined!

Today has been a bit of a rough day for me, I’ll admit, I woke up with soooo many thoughts in my head and trying to sort them is completely new to me, I don’t normally sort my thoughts out well and so trying to do that today has got my head just full of aches lol…..but it’s okay because I know that there’s something that is very important I want to do and if I end up losing a little bit of sleep from it or feel myself getting slightly anxious on, I’m alright with that! Plans aren’t my normal cup of tea, but I’ve been trying to embrace it a little better instead of getting intimidated by them,

Plans are important they can help layout things so you don’t feel all over the place! Normally I like going with things naturally, but I’ve also been learning that sometimes you need to plan for things in order to work them out, if you just let things always go as they are, whatever is most important to you can get away from you and if that’s something you don’t want then you have to really work at them and take those steps to having them come to fruition and making them happen…..I’m always being told that life is short and you want to make sure you’re always giving attention to the things that matter most even if it seems hard, it can seem like you won’t get there, but if you want it enough and you believe in it enough….you already know that it can get there, you just have to take those steps to get them there!

Now with the things that I’m planning, there’s a few decisions that I’ve come to realize I need to face and deal with, even though some of the stuff may not be my favorite to want to deal with…..it’s up to me to take that breath, put on a brave face and do it anyway…..with planning you also have to make decisions tough or not, because that’s the only way for you to grow better and to experience things without all the limits of it all it all, you have to allow yourself to fly even if you are bat scared shit of it and yes I’m saying it just like that because it’s how I’m feeling it at the moment….if we continue to always keep ourselves on the ground, as safe as it may be sometimes you have to also fly or float otherwise you’ll always be there wishing you could soar that blue sky!

I recently went on a trip as you may know if you read that post and I was really nervous when I was waiting to go on the plane, but once I got on the plane…..I don’t know I was very happy, I smiled to myself knowing I did something that scared me and even when I was on the vacation I was on…..I was ready to go back on the plane……it just felt good and I really enjoyed myself knowing that I was ahead somewhere that I hadn’t been yet and that’s what I want to continue, I want to keep discovering, exploring and going on adventures…..but also I want to share that experience and so if I need to plan in order to do that, like I said…..I will!

The upcoming plan idea is to finally be able to see my love again and figure out how we can be together permanently, we both have wanted that for a good now sooo, I’m just hoping that it all goes well for us this time, which we’ll make sure it does!

All The Love ❤ ❤

Lexa

Slow Down….

On By Daydreamer LexIn Entries, UncategorizedLeave a comment

When you find some pressure on the rise or you’re feeling a little irritated, take a moment to just slow down a little, feelings of pressure and stress can cause irrational ways of thinking and with that you won’t really be able to focus much on anything……so take a moment to firstly breathe when you feel the height of the pressure and guide yourself to slow down a bit.

I know it’s probably not the easiest thing to do once you’re already in a state of pressure, but it’ll help to re focus your thoughts to become a little more clearer, all while helping you to get back to a clam state of being…..now it may take some time before you’re fully back to feeling at ease again and that’s okay, it’s not about how quickly you can do it, but just taking the moment to become aware so that you can not only process things,

but also just be fully present towards what you’re doing…..slowing down doesn’t always necessarily have to mean doing things slow, it can mean to just….take your time and maybe take things in a little more, look around a bit and while you’re at it, breathe a little deeper than you might’ve before.

Try and appreciate the small things that you maybe missed before, find enjoyment it all that you do big or small, but most importantly have patience and trust that it’s all going to work out and be alright!!

All The Love ❤ ❤

Lexa

I Swore Myself I’d Leave Myself Alone……

On By Daydreamer LexIn UncategorizedLeave a comment

For those wondering, this line is from one of my favorite songs by one of my all time favorite artists, i’ve talked about her before, Alexz Johnson, not sure if that rings a bell, but…..the last time I talked about her, was when I was talking about her latest song called Weight, it’s been a while since I actually listened to that song, now she’s got new ones, plus a new album, that I still haven’t heard…..there’s a lot of songs from the artists I listen to that I need to check out, I always think of listening to them, but I never really get around to it, I might have to pick a day to just sit and have a listen to them.

But enough about music talk, that’s not actually where it was going….I just thought i’d have a chat about things if that’s alright…..if you do want to talk about music do let me know and i’ll make sure to write a separate post focusing on that……if you’re curious to check out the post that I mentioned you can find it here: Now Playing….Weight By Alexz Johnson

Anyway let’s have a chat shall we!?…..okay so i’m going to be honest i’m not really sure what i’m planning on talking about, I just know that i’d like to chat a bit, now normally i’d express the things i’m wanting to express, but maybe we should do it a little differently, how about we talk on the line of Alexz’s song careless and it’s meaning, now when you look at it, you’d say it’s pretty self explanatory right!? Yeah well i’d say so too, anytime I hear this song and this line comes up in the song, I always feel it and it’s because it’s a relatable line, most of us don’t know how to leave ourselves alone or better yet ease up on ourselves, we’re always so harsh for some reason.

I mean i’m sure that reason is to make sure we’re our best self, which is great, but we always tend to be the most harsh when we know we’re already feeling a certain way, it’s like even when we know we should shape up and get over our feelings, we’re still harsh about it, saying things like “you’re always doing that” “why can’t you just stop thinking so hard” and so on and it always feels like there’s two versions of ourselves the being that we are, but also this other person whose meant to be there to keep us moving or at least does they’re best to keep us on our feet……

Now we all know the saying on “tough love” and for some it works, but others not always, I mean why do we always think being judgmental and scolding ourselves is the best thing to do!? Why can’t we instead be a little patient with ourselves!? If there’s a moment where we’re feeling agitated, emotional and other non great feelings, why can’t we support ourselves for a moment and just allow ourselves to feel!?

This might sound confusing and may not make much sense……but what I mean is, we shouldn’t go screaming at ourselves because we’re feeling a certain way and we shouldn’t go judging ourselves either, getting more upset with ourselves especially when we’re already upset, doesn’t really fix things does it!? If anything it only makes us more upset,

because there’s more pressure being added, now sure pressure is apart of life, but do we really need to give ourselves more pressure!? We have to be better at being patient with ourselves and not be so harsh with the things we do, especially with how we handle our emotions and thoughts, because those are the big things that really can get to us, if we let it…….

I think instead of going for the attack, the best way to handle those moments, is to just be more aware and do our best to make sure we don’t overload and if we know we need a moment to release thoughts, emotions and so fourth, we just gotta let ourselves have that moment, but we also shouldn’t allow ourselves to get wrapped in it for too long,

Just take it as going for a walk or hiking of some sort, take that moment, but don’t allow it to overtake you when you need it and also just patience……we may need to take this line of Alexz’s song as a reminder for the times we go to be harsh to ourselves, but stop because we’re having to remember to be aware not to, maybe if we do that, we’d see a bit of a difference.

But that’s all I have, now before we close this off, I just wanted to share that, there’s a new video on my channel if you’re interested, I uploaded it Wednesday, since we’re getting close to midnight here, i’m just having a bit of a chat, but if you want to check that out, you can find it here: 7pm With A Different View but anyway I should probably head to sleep now, seeing as it’s now midnight, I hope you all are well and you guys have a good night.

All The Love ❤ ❤

Lexa

No Need To Try So Hard…..

On By Daydreamer LexIn Entries, UncategorizedLeave a comment

Ask yourself this question…..why do we try so hard!? Did you answer it!? If so what did you say!? When we try hard to get things right, most often we find that it turns out not so right all the time, why is that!? Well it’s exactly what it is, we’re trying too hard, when in reality, we don’t need to.

Now you might be saying to yourself, well how else are we meant to do it!? Try hard a little less possibly….!? Yes I know how exactly!? Well for one, we gotta relax and chill out, breathe and let things flow at a natural state,

When we try too hard, we create resistance, which also invites stress, causing us to feel overwhelmed by everything and let me tell you it’s not a great feeling you know……we’re only adding pressure to ourselves by doing that, if we constantly worry about things not being a certain way and trying to get it right all the time, we wouldn’t have things be as natural as they are would we!? It’s okay to push yourself harder then you might normally at times, but when you start trying so hard to the point where you’re stressing yourself out, that is the moment where you need to step back and take a couple of breathers otherwise, you’re going to drive yourself mad.

Although it’s great to want to push yourself to be better, we don’t always have to try so hard to do that, we can do that and do our best all at the same time, minus the stress and feelings of being overwhelmed, just because something may seem or feel not all that great, doesn’t mean that is isn’t all that great, sometimes we may need to just relook at things or tweak something in order for it to make sense and come out right…..

It’s good to go on what you feel, but sometimes what we may feel to be not so good in our heads, actually isn’t all that bad, just keep that in mind……

All The Love ❤ ❤

Lexa

2 Weeks Away, Almost 3….

On By Daydreamer LexIn Entries, Uncategorized8 Comments

How’s everyone doing these days, hope well!! Now I know what some of you are probably thinking, “Where have you been!?” and if you aren’t thinking that well then, that’s okay, but I will sorta explain why I haven’t written anything new for the past 2 to almost 3 weeks, I think the longest i’ve went not posting is about a few days maybe a week, this times a new record, we surpassed a week of not posting, can we get an hurrah!?

No i’m kidding, I haven’t posted on here for a reason, you see i’ve been away due to my brain thinking a lot mainly on where i’m going or want to go at least……there’s a lot of things that I haven’t really expressed on here, I might do that one day, not sure when exactly, but one day……

I still haven’t gained that much courage to do so just yet. Now even though I haven’t written and posted anything new on my blog in a good while, I have been still writing, just more handwriting then typing, i’m actually close to filling one of my journals, not quite finished, but it’s getting there i’d say.

So yeah, i’ve been trying to really think on what I want to do (career wise) this isn’t anything new really, it’s something that i’ve been switching back and forth with for a good while now, i’ve just been putting it off for a good amount of time and you know what that’s no one else’s fault but mine, you think you’re fine with something, but then realize you’re not.

So yeah there’s that for one……i’ve also been trying to get better at certain things…..still sorta working on that……i’m kinda feeling a bit of stress and pressure and that’s me doing that to myself because I really want to get somewhere and feel good about it, I mean we all do don’t we!?

There’s a lot let’s just say, but i’m doing my best to work it all out so I could move forward from where i’ve always been stood, if that makes sense!?

I must say this has got to be the most i’ve written in a while on here, which is surprising for some reason, because normally I write a lot, in my journals at least, i’m not sure how often i’ll be posting on here, I kinda purposely stepped away from here just so I can get my head straight and that, plus i’ve been wanting to make this blog better and i’m not sure in what way I want to do that, maybe it’ll be more personal or something, i’m not sure yet.

Hopefully it’ll all just happen naturally, but yeah that’s just a bit of an update I guess you can say, I don’t know what else to say, I hope you’re all doing well and having a good day sorry it’s taken me a few weeks to write, I kinda felt as though I didn’t have much to say so I didn’t, I have missed it though I won’t say I didn’t, i’m always on here believe it or not haha……

That’s all I have for now, but I will post something again soon, maybe not this week or maybe, who know, I might surprise you and post something one of these days or during the weekend, i’ll go based on if I feel I want to say something or how i’m feeling, right now it’s just how things are going,

But you guys enjoy the rest of your day or night depending on what time of day it is where you are and i’ll write to you guys again soon.

P.S. Since we’re coming to the closing days of Summer I thought i’d share something I made a while ago, I was meant to post it, but never did…..

All The Love ❤ < 3

~Lexa~

Feb 1, 2019

On By Daydreamer LexIn EntriesLeave a comment

SO as you all know today is the first day of February, which means we have left January behind, it’s insane how quickly time goes ain’t it!? not really sure what to write and talk about, i’m in a bit of a mood today, i’m trying so really sort myself out, because i’m at the point where if I don’t i’m just going to continue to feel not 100 percent happy and I can’t keep feeling not 100 percent happy, I know i’m lacking in the “be in the moment and enjoy things more” department, I don’t know how to get out of being there.

It’s like although i’m trying so flipping hard to come back to being my old self, I know that i’m still not entirely there and everyone keeps telling me that i’m constantly stress and that i’m not the same, as if I don’t know that!! I know the stress I feel, I have to keep on a lower level compared to how I was initially feeling it and i’ve been working on that, now the whole i’m not 100 percent myself part, that’s a little hard at the moment.

When you’ve been feeling a certain way for a good while, you’re not just going to go back to being 100 percent right away, everyone knows that and it’s like everyone want me to be back already, i’m trying, but right now i’m trying to keep myself focus, i’m trying to figure things out on where i’m supposed to go, my minds is constantly all over the place and i’m trying to keep it in a state that is manageable to where i’m able to control it, all it really is, is me trying to have some kind of balance once again.

I know i’m a certain way and i’m trying to not only work with it, but also change it to a different way to what i’m use to if any of that makes sense!? When it comes to the way I am, I can’t really explain it to you, I just do things and work a different way than most people do and that’s for a reason, but that shouldn’t be an excuse, not that i’m trying to make like it is, i’m just saying that…….because of the way I am, i’m trying to fix the way I process and do things and it’s not easy, but i’m trying………….I know I need to get out more and push myself to doing things that I normally wouldn’t………

It’s a lot of pressure not just from around me, but also from within myself, i’m very hard on myself when it comes to a whole lot of things and one of the main things is coming out of my comfort zone, i’m so use to it, but I know that everyone has that issue so that’s not an excuse…………I know that everyone is worrying about me and I know that they’re not happy, but what am I suppose to do, i’m doing the best that I can and I really am trying……….

I will say though……….I do need to work on enjoying things more, it’s not like i’m not, it’s just taking me a bit longer than I expected to really enjoy it properly, but i’m going to continue to work on that and have a bit more fun more, even though i’m trying to stay focus on where i’m going in my life, I know that’s one of the things i’m lacking and i’ll work on it more.

I do hope that i’m getting somewhere though and that i’m doing alright in my life, that’s one of my main thoughts all the time, that and wanting things to be better, with the little bit of hope i’m trying to keep near me always……………….I hope it does.

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~

Action……

On By Daydreamer LexIn EntriesLeave a comment

So I tried to write a poem on the word action and I couldn’t really think of anything so I ended up writing a different one. Action……….I don’t know what exactly it is about the word, but for some reason I can’t help, but feel a little nervous with it and I know that sounds silly, because who would be nervous just seeing the word action, it’s just a word right!?

Yes and no, it’s a bit of both really, most people wouldn’t mind the word overall, it’s a form of productivity, you know getting things done and everything, so why can it make us feel nervous or scared!? Why does it tend to make us freeze or frantic about sometimes!? If I had the answer i’d tell you, believe me I would, but i’m not really sure about it myself……….

I guess when it comes to it the whole phrase “Actions speaks louder than words” it can leave you feeling this pressure which can cause you to want to either go into frantic mode or panic mode. This may sound very silly, but as i’m writing this i’m actually feeling a little anxious, makes no sense I know, but that’s an example of when I say it can it can leave you feeling pressured.

It doesn’t matter whether we’re up and moving with it or not, we’ll always have some kind of pressure added with it and that’s because we naturally put pressure on ourselves. Some of us put too much pressure and some of us find a way to add the right amount of pressure that’s needed, how I have no idea, I guess it’s just because some of us are better at handling pressure.

I’m not really the best under pressure though, I always tend to beat myself up when it comes to things in general, so when i’m already doing that and there’s more pressure added to that, it just makes things worst and believe me sometimes I wish I wasn’t so bad under pressure, but because I know that I am, i’m trying to keep myself calm and not get so worked up easily.

I also know that when it comes to action, I panic before the whole action part and I don’t understand why that always happens with me, but it does, I have ideas and sometimes it’ll take a while for me to actually go through with them………..it’s just a lot of things I guess I don’t know………….i’m not really sure where it started, where I started being afraid of taking action!?

It’s weird because, i’ve been going back into my mind, thinking about the times where action wasn’t a problem, i’m trying to figure out when exactly it happened to where I started going more and more into myself, wanting to understand why I have so much trouble with going fourth with certain things and why i’m always thinking about things too much!?

Why is action always a brick wall in my mind!? I don’t really know why and I don’t think I should ask why, the action part of me I know has to come out eventually and the part that likes to sit and do a deep analyze on whether I should or not, needs to come up with something, patience with a little assertiveness added, might just be the trick to keep the pressure balanced.

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~