Clouded Mind, Trying Times And Uncertainty……

When you’re dealing with a clouded mind, it’s hard to shake it off right away, although you may try your hardest, we all know that it ain’t always easy getting rid of the thoughts that form within that little cloud we got following us around everywhere, sometimes it grows so big that the cloud ends up changing into a storm cloud making our mood change with it and now we’re walking around wondering when that storm cloud is gonna part from us. Clouded minds form in different ways, sometimes they happen when you wake up in the morning or during the middle of your day, they can pretty much occur anytime of the day, you could be having the best morning and once the afternoon comes rolling around there goes your thoughts and all the happiness you had going for you………clouds of thoughts aren’t always a bad thing though, sometimes they help you reflect on your day or help you sort through certain things that need sorting, however clouded thoughts can also make your mood go from a 5 to 9 (you never want to get to a 10 because then that’s when the lighting strikes)

Now let’s talk about trying times, I know there’s like a 3 word saying with trying times but I can’t remember exactly what the other two are, so we’re just gonna go with the theme I created…..anyway, trying times……….i’m not sure if anyone has a different meaning when it comes to trying times, but to me trying times has to do with dealing with all the things around you, but still trying your best to get through them, i’ll be honest today i’m not really having the best of days, but i’m trying to still get through the day and try and make the most of it as much as I can. On a good note, it’s been raining and if I haven’t said it already I enjoy the rain, every time it rains I always go outside and just take it in……I don’t know I guess I just like the feel of it and the way it comes down, it’s just really nice.

Back to trying times though (Sorry got caught up talking about the rain ha) like I was saying trying times is going through life and the day and just trying to see the better picture in something that you really aren’t feeling in that moment, but you’re still determined to try and understand and get it, even though some days are tough compared to when you’re having a good day. Trying times is having someone you care about go through something and you wanting to help, but you’re unable to do so in the way that you want to, yet you still do your best to make sure they know that you’re there when they need you and you’re always gonna be there because they mean so much to you. It’s just all about how even when you know or feel like you aren’t able to really get into something that you might normally, you still try and you still do your best because you have to and because you want to be strong in a situation that isn’t always easy to be strong in, but you do it because you feel that it’s gonna be worth it at some point and you want to prove to yourself that you can stay strong and what you’re feeling is only temporary.

Now let’s get into our last topic here……..Uncertainty, everyone deals with uncertainty in their lives, some more than others, whether that be because their whole life that’s all they dealt with growing up or it occurred down the line due to a mental scaring based off an event that took place in their life and so now with certain things they tend to worry about whether something will work out or not or if what their doing in their life is good or bad for them. Dealing with uncertainty and having those doubtful moments aren’t the best feeling, because it puts you in such an anxious or paranoid mode that when you try and escape it, it just kinda brings everything back and then you start to question everything and it just becomes such a heavy weigh on you to the point where you feel like you just hit a brick wall without even realizing that you were even walking in that direction. You can try and tell yourself that you have nothing to worry about and for a bit it will work, but it will only put that feeling to a halt for but so long until that brick wall comes tumbling down on you making everything 1,000 times worst then it was already.

Some may think that it’s easy to get rid of uncertainty once you feel it by telling yourself you’re fine, brush yourself off and keep moving, but for some people it’s not always that easy, it can take them a very long time to get out of that mindset and if you’re dealing with that quite often, sometimes you need someone there to help and reassure you that everything’s gonna be fine and that you will be there to help them get through those uncertainties that they are facing. It’s gonna take a lot of patience and everything because it will come and go for them, but as long as you let them know that no matter what you’re there for them they’ll be fine, it doesn’t matter how many times they need reassurance, you’ll always be there to make sure they’re okay and let them know that with you they are safe and they’re not alone, because you’re gonna help them get through it and for some that may seem like a lot of reassuring, but if you really care and love someone truly, that won’t matter because to you they are a priority and it’s important to show them that their happiness and wellbeing is important as well.

We all have different mindsets and people think that some of us are able to shake things off quickly, but it’s not always that easy, some of us need a little more time to really understand our thoughts and others may need someone to help them through theirs and that’s okay. So if you’re ever having a clouded mind, don’t be afraid to process your thoughts and sort them out, know that you will get through trying times even if it doesn’t feel like you will, you just have to give it time and lastly when you’re feeling uncertain or you’re dealing with uncertainties in your life, know that you don’t need to deal with it alone, I know it feels like there’s just so much going on and maybe there is, but know that everything will be okay and there’s always someone there to help you through your uncertainties.

That is my blog post for the day, I hope that some of you were able to take something from this and hopefully found this really helpful if you are dealing with anyone of these things, with that I hope you all have a goodnight/morning and or evening 🙂

 

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~

Dealing With Anxiety, Depression, Eating Disorders And Other Mental Illnesses…….

Let’s talk about dealing with Anxiety for a moment shall we!? I’m gonna be the one to say it and i’m sure a lot of you will agree if you too deal with anxiety on a daily basis. Anxiety is the WORST sometimes, especially when you’re dealing with something that shouldn’t be that big of a deal, but it is for some reason, it’s like no matter what you do your brain just likes to remind you there’s a problem and that it’s totally gonna make it a bigger problem then it actually is. Now i’ll be real because that’s why i’m writing this and I want to be as real as I can when it comes to my blog posts. I feel if you’re expressing yourself and words fail you when you need it most, writing about how you feel is the best way to get everything you’re thinking and feeling out, when you feel like you can’t really talk to anyone because they won’t really understand and get it, so you think to yourself “well since no one will listen or I know they’re not gonna understand and get it, i’ll just write it.” Writing really is a nice way to just de stress and get all your thoughts out of your mind, i’ve spoken about this before in my finding your happy place blog post, If you haven’t read that one you can read it here: Finding Your Happy Place…..

Anyway to dealing with Anxiety………this is a little hard for me because I don’t really like to talk about it, I only speak about it to certain people that I trust and are really close to me and the ones that I tell they either get it and understand because they too deal with certain things in their life or if they don’t get it, they will take the time to try and understand what it is i’m going through. When I was about 19 years old i’d say, I was in my teens (late teens) I had just graduated from high school or it was around the time I graduated. I went to see this specialist and with me i’m not really comfortable around certain people if I feel some kind of energy i’m not use to or that I don’t like, I stay away from it because I don’t like the way it makes me feel, so obviously if you know somethings bothering or you don’t like someone or you get a weird vibe you keep yourself away right!? So we saw this specialist and right away the vibe that I got even before I went inside the office they were in I hated it, I just didn’t like the atmosphere of the place, I hated everything about it, made me super anxious and it felt weird.

So we go into the office of the specialist who was speaking with me and I couldn’t make eye contact because I was super uncomfortable, I just wanted to get out of there so bad. While being in there, they had me do some…….I don’t know what it is, but it kinda is to see what is wrong with you, all I remember is having to look at pictures and tell them what I saw in them and also look at this book with different things in it and I think remember it or copy what I saw (It was a long time ago so I barely remember) but while doing those activities I still didn’t make eye contact with the specialist and if I did it was only for a second, like literally a second. Long story short…….good news is I was told i’m a really good visual learner and that made me happy, next part didn’t though………because he then says I have a problem with looking people in the eyes (Only people I don’t trust or like) that’s when I learned that what I had was anxiety………now I know there are a lot of different types of anxiety, but I was never really informed on which one I had so I don’t know exactly the kind I have…….but yeah I found out that I had developed anxiety and I never really understood what that was until I was told I had it. When you’re told that you’re dealing with some kind of mental illness it’s not always easy to process how you feel in that moment and to those around you, because they don’t understand it entirely and what it does to you, to them everything you’re feeling isn’t a big deal you know.

People who deal with a mental illness, be it Anxiety, Depression, Eating Disorders and all the different issues people go through on a daily basis. To them everything they’re feeling is real, it’s not just something in the moment, it’s not something you should be brushing off as just another problem and they’ll deal with it and be fine the next day……no…….those kind of illnesses don’t just go away, it’s there from the day they know they’re dealing with something, but don’t really understand what it is yet and i’ll be there for the rest of their life. People don’t understand that when it comes to dealing with a mental illness there’s a whole lot to learn, It’s not just “oh they’re going through their problems again or they’re having some kind of a bad day but no worries they’ll get over it and be okay” That’s not how it works. You ever heard that saying where it goes “The people who are the most happy are the ones suffering the most” Yeah that saying is true, people who have a daily battle within themselves, but try to save face just so people don’t ask them what’s wrong because they don’t want to have to face that fear of “if I tell them they will just think it ones of those normal issues that everyone goes through and tell me to just get over it” or they think they are being a burden on you so they won’t dare cross that line of feeling like fool and putting their mental issues on to someone else. I know that everyone goes through difficult times in their lives, but you also have to keep in mind that some people go through so much worst then what everyone thinks.

For those people who sit there and say “oh i’m so depressed” freely sure you might be, but why don’t you live in the mind of someone who deals with actual depression every day of their life. Same goes for someone dealing with anxiety and or other mental illnesses, you can’t just think that, that’s how it is because there’s a lot more to it then what society projects it as, A WHOLE LOT MORE…….When it comes to me, dealing with my anxiety is hard, i’m not gonna lie, people who deal with it will get it. Again I don’t know what kind of anxiety I have, I don’t think it’s social anxiety because when I want to i’m very expressive and I know how to make friends, but that’s only when I feel like I don’t have to pretend, I can just be me and I feel comfortable with my surroundings and with certain people. Although if you were to ask my family they’d probably tell you i’m anti-social, because honestly I don’t come out of my room so much. I stay to myself and in my room all the time, but that’s only because I enjoy being by myself, I prefer to be in my own space where I know I can be me and not have to worry about anything. When i’m around the right people though it’s like i’m a totally different person because like I said before, when I feel comfortable I can be very out-going and I enjoy myself.

If you were to watch me closely, you’d see how I am when i’m around friends or people i’m comfortable with, compared to when it’s just me and my family, it’s not that I don’t want to be around them, it’s just not my thing and plus I got so use to being by myself in my own space, it just kinda stuck with me……..To conclude what my point is here, when it comes to people who deal with Anxiety, Depression, Eating Disorders and other types of mental illness. You have to be kinder to them, you can’t just brush off their issues as normal things. You have to help them through it, talk to them about their feelings, reassure them, that kind of help, forcing them to come to you is not what you should do, go to them and really listen to how their feeling, don’t hear them, really listen. Let them know that whatever they’re going through, you’re there to help them get through it and you’re there if they need you. Stop treating mental illnesses like it’s nothing because to me and everyone else going through it, it’s not just nothing, it’s everything.

For those dealing with Anxiety, Depression and other mental illnesses, there are people who will help you and listen to you, don’t keep your emotions in, talk to someone, a friend, close family members just someone you trust and you know will really take the time to listen and also there’s a lot of different hotlines you call if you just need someone and you feel like no one will listen to you. Remember to hang in there and even though it doesn’t seem like it, things will get better and you will get through it.

That’s all from me I know this is probably the longest blog i’ve ever written, but I just felt that I had to say this because there are people dealing with these kinds of mental illnesses on a daily basis and people don’t seem to understand how serious it really is. I just hope that I said everything okay and yeah……I just want you all to know that this is from my point of you on everything and also has to do with what I feel when it comes to dealing with my Anxiety. I hope you’re all doing okay and I hope you have a good night/morning/evening.

 

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~

 

 

Negatives VS Positives

Although i’ve already written about fighting through the negatives and trying your best to stay positive, sometimes it’s better said then done you know………especially when you’re battling negatives all the time, I asked myself earlier how do you stay positive when all your around is negativity!? i’m still figuring that out actually and although I try my hardest to stay as positive as I can it’s so very hard………I just want to be able to feel good again, i’m sure you all have those days where no matter how hard you try and how hard you fight off the negativity you just somehow feel a little defeated too…….I know i’m meant to be positive here and i’ll do my best to turn this around someway, I just really feel this so much……….

Now let’s talk how we’re going to turn this around, so the question is how do you stay so positive when all you are around is negativity!? I don’t know……..I want to say I have all the answers and I wish I could tell you exactly how to stay positive in a wave of negativity, but I don’t even know……..all I know is we have to find and hold on to something that will keep us going and keep us from falling apart completely, just so we can have that bit of hope and faith that will somehow get us through the day and in the end will be worth all the pain and struggles we had to go through………

I don’t know if I turned this around and wrote this in a good light or anything, but what I was trying to get at is that whether you’re struggling in your life right now and you feel like days aren’t getting better or it’s just too hard to go on, please go on and keep pushing yourself somehow to get to where you want to be in life, because all that you’re feeling is only temporary, I know it doesn’t seem that way and you probably heard that from a lot of different people, but giving up and letting yourself be defeated isn’t what you want to do, you should never let negativity win because you’re only giving up on yourself when you do that so PLEASE……..please keep pushing and know that better days will come, sure it’s gonna take a bit of time, but they will……..and if you feel like you can’t push yourself look to those around you to help, I would suggest those who really understand and get you and always makes sure you don’t fall flat on your face. 🙂

I hope you find your flashlight to guide you through the dark (I was inspired by Jessie J with that line lol XD) All the love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~