Purpose….

They say we all have a purpose, but what if that purpose isn’t anything specific, say that purpose is just more on what we make of something or what we want to do with ourselves. Whenever we’re told “Your here for a purpose” it can make you feel as though your supposed to do something great, something BIG and that kind of thing can feel pretty stressful.

I mean what is this purpose we need to do and are we even doing it right!? These kind of questions can make you feel unsure of a lot of things, with the word purpose, when you look at it and say it, it seems important, it can make you feel as though you have to carry the world on your shoulder and be this unstoppable force to be reckon with, even though those are just sayings and are a metaphor, it still feels like a huge thing to do.

You think to yourself “Why do we see it as this wondrous thing and why do we care and try to live up to it?” When it comes to the word “Purpose” it’s intimidating to have to try and step up to something you have no clue to what it’s about or it’s true concept, the saying “we’re meant to be here”

Is also pretty intimidating, it pretty much goes hand in hand with the word purpose, both have this feeling of importance, like something is expected to where you have to follow some kind of mystery road and or path, yet it’s an unclear clue to what and where it actually is.

That all being said, I know that there are some things that have a specific purpose, some are useful and some useless and when I say useless, I mean it more on the side of not quite what you expected it to be, take some toys for example, some are very educational and quite useful and really fun, but then you have some toys that only do one thing and can end up being a little underwhelming/anticlimactic and not as fun, although you probably know not to get your hopes up with it, you kinda sorta do anyway.

You always kind of feel like it’s going to surprise you and do something extraordinary for some reason and when it doesn’t (as expected) it leaves you feeling pretty bummed out, but you knew it would do that, but it’s that hope that it might do something else, even though you know it’s not going to because it’s meant to be a one thing kind of toy, but you’re left there sighing to yourself, thinking “I guess I knew that’d happen” but on the other hand sometimes you’ll come across a toy, you think is a one purpose thing, but end up learning that sometimes it’ll have other useful uses to it, leaving you both mind blown and full of joy, which you gotta love, who knew right!?

Going back on track though and talking more life base of what we’re supposed to be doing and that, that kind of purpose can throw you for a loop and leave your head going in circles or wandering for days on end, making you think, if there is some kind of purpose and we are meant to be here, why do we have a hard time knowing what it is and what to do?

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa

Chatting Session: Letting It Snow While Reflecting & Talking All Things Random (Dec 13, 2018)

Disclaimer: This was written earlier in the day 

That title there kinda makes it sound like I have some kind of super power or something, although I wish I did have some kind of superpower and it would be real nice to control the weather a bit, i’m not storm from X-Men though, so I can’t do that. Even if I did have a superpower I wouldn’t chose to control the weather actually, i’d go with teleportation I don’t know I always thought i’d be cool to just be able to be anywhere you wanted in flash you know!? How about you guys, what would you’re superpower be if you were giving one!? Also I hope you’re all doing well.

Okay now that we’ve talked on what kind of superpowers we’d have if given one, let’s talk snow!! The reasoning for talking about snow is because it’s snowing where I am, not sure when it actually started, but when I woke up it was snowing which then made me start sing one of of my favorite Christmas songs, Let It Snow sung and maybe written by Dean Martin, I know he sings it, but I don’t know if he wrote it, but anyway, I like the snow, not a big fan of the cold, but the snow it’s pretty alright. It always looks so nice when it starts coming down, it starts off slowly and then quickens the more snow there is………I love the peaceful feeling the snow brings, it keeps you calm and when you’re looking at it, you don’t feel stressed, you feel cold, but not overwhelmed or anything like that.

You know it’s quite interesting when you learn that all snowflakes aren’t the same, they all fall a different way, they’re different sizes and shapes, but even though that is true, you know that they all get to the ground eventually. It’s crazy how some of them are very noticeable and then you have those that aren’t as noticeable, some are for a second and others you don’t see them, when there’s a lot of snow though, that’s when you start wanting to sing Winter Wonderland. Seeing a whole blanket full of snow is like being in a whole new world, makes you want to lay in it even though you know that if you did, you’d be freezing………i’m sure it would still feel nice though in a way ha. Everyone loves whenever there’s snow on tress, it’s probably because it gives them some sort of character, you look at them and right away you’re in awe.

The fact that it’s even snowing tells us how close Winter is, it’s literally next week I believe, gotta love the cold weather right!? You know it’s crazy because even though, i’m not a huge fan of the cold, it seems to be the one season that sticks with me through all the seasons, there’s not one day where i’m not super cold, unless it’s very very hot. If I were to turn on the fan I have, give it a few minutes or so and i’ll either be putting on a cardigan or i’m turning it off, that’s how easily cold I get, don’t know why, i’ve just always been the cold one. I’m sure you all know the movie Frozen right!? Well i’m not a huge fan of the movie, it’s not a bad movie it’s just not my favorite, but i’m pretty much Elsa when it comes to the cold, just to give you an idea. 

I’ve been doing some reflecting today a bit, which I tend to do quite often these days I find, maybe this years just a year of reflection I don’t know………Christmas is around the corner, I hope you guys are excited, it’s crazy how close it actually is, once that’s up the New Year will be here………..it feels like 2018 just started and now it’s coming to an end, I guess we say that every year don’t we!? I think it all depends on whether the year made an impact on you or not when it comes to reflecting on it. I think if the year didn’t leave you looking back on it, it wouldn’t feel like anything changed for you, it just would feel like another year.

Everything goes by so quickly, which I can see why they say not to blink otherwise you just might miss something important……..although we have our reflection kind of days, it’s not until you get to the end of the year where you find yourself really looking back on things, I didn’t really start reflecting much until the ending of 2017 for certain reasons, before then I didn’t really look back on the years prior, at least not as much as I have this year. I know we still have a few more days, 2 more weeks until this year is over, so i’ll be reflecting a bit more, as i’m sure you guys will too before we have to look back on 2018 one last time.

Let me know in the comments below what your reflections are for today and feel free to share if your guys are excited for Christmas and if you’re looking forward and are ready for 2019 to arrive.     

All The Love ❤ ❤ 

~Lexa~

Photo by Nathan Fertig on Unsplash

Reflection (December 5, 2018)

Hey everyone hope you’re all doing well today, as you all know we’re still in the beginning of the month December, todays the 5th of course and so I thought let’s do a little reflecting on some stuff……….where do we start!? We all do a little reflecting from time to time, sometimes their good and other times they don’t feel the best, but no matter how they come about, they can help even if in the moment it doesn’t seem like it.

Today for me, my reflective state is more on the not sure side of town, I feel alright kinda, I guess…….it’s just i’m not sure on a lot of things and I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing, I don’t know how to really balance things out or if I do balance things, i’m not sure whether to look at it in a positive light more or the opposite. I don’t really want to look at it in a bad light, it’s just when you feel something, it’s hard to not really look into it a certain way you know!?……..I’m not sure if i’m making sense right now, but I hope you understand what i’m trying to say. 

I’ll just get to the point of why i’m in a reflective mode at the moment. So I was looking to add a different profile photo to my blog site and my social medias, but as I was doing that, I couldn’t help, but look at some of my other photos in my gallery and looking back at them………well i’ll just say it, I smiled for a bit…….and then I found myself getting emotional after………..I don’t know why………okay I do know why, it was because I realized how much I really changed from those photos. In them I would always smile, I would even take random photos of myself when I was having a really good day or if I liked the way I looked, I know that probably sounds real shallow or something, but believe me I wasn’t doing it for attention or anything. 

I’d just take random silly photos because I was happy and those photos I never posted because I didn’t feel the need to, I just felt I wanted to take them so I could look back at them. It sounds crazy I know, but really they were just photos to look back on for me. As I was looking back on them though, I couldn’t help, but go into deep thought mode……….I wrote in my writing journal that most people when they reflect they don’t question their changes, at least I don’t think they do……….me though i’m always going back and forth with my changes, had I not changed would things be different!? I don’t know…….it’s like I have days where I feel the changes that happened to me are i’m sure for the better, but at the same time I also wonder if me changing………was it wrong!? should I have done that!? I don’t know……….

I know a lot of us don’t plan on changing, it just happens and a lot of the time we aren’t prepared for it, I didn’t expect the changes that occurred, to turn things upside down. It’s kinda like being in the middle of an ocean or river………everything’s fine you’re enjoying all that is happening around you and it’s just great, you feel great………then out of nowhere you find that the current of the ocean or river start picking up, at first you think you’re able to handle it and that you will bounce back and everything will be okay again………but then it starts to get worst and the current from the river or ocean, you find is going into speed mode and you’re holding on as best as you can, but you know that it’s not good enough.

You’re trying to stay calm and not panic, but it just keeps getting stronger and faster, now you find yourself starting to freak out “What is happening!?” “Why is this happening” “I don’t know what to do” all of those things keep running in and out of your head, but even though all that is happening, you still do your best to stay calm even though you’re freaking out. After a good while of dealing and going through all that mess, things start to calm down and the current starts to go back to normal a bit………the only thing is now, you find yourself constantly having mental breakdowns and becoming unsure of a lot of things, some days your good, other days your not……..time passes though and you feel a little better, you find yourself kinda getting back into the groove of things, you’re doing the best you can, yet you know that deep down, not only are things not the same entirely………..but neither are you.

You sit with yourself, contemplating in your mind how everything go so out of wack so quickly, what happened!? why did it happen!? and then you kinda start to blame yourself, saying things like “If I hadn’t changed or if I hadn’t done this……..everything would be fine, non of this would’ve happened”……….It’s crazy you know, that saying that goes ” A lot can happen within a year” is true, you could go from feeling the greatest that you’ve ever felt in a long time, to constantly feeling unsure of everything and constantly wondering………now maybe all that is for the better, who’s to say it isn’t right!?

Sometimes though, it’s that curious side to us that has to always wonder whether it is or not. Even if we ended up getting caught in a huge current, that we weren’t prepared for………..we still should look at things from a different perspective, maybe all that was to see how much you could handle, maybe you’ll look back at it and reflect on it differently, who knows………for now, we’ll just do our best and try to take in everything around us again and when the current starts to pick up again, we’ll be as prepared as we can be and hopefully this time it isn’t all that bad.

All The Love ❤ ❤ 

~Lexa~ 

Photo by Michael Niessl on Unsplash

Monday Randoms: Welcoming December With Some Random Thoughts Added

Although I know it’s 3 days late into the month, I just want to say welcome December, I hope that you’re doing well. You’re the last month until the new year rolls around……it’s crazy how quickly the year went, the last thing I remember is being lost and stuck in the summer months and now we’re here, December 3rd, beginning of a new month as well as the ending of an old year. I know we still have a few days to go until Christmas arrives and the year goes from 2018 to 2019…….it’s a little scary knowing how close we actually are, will 2019 be a different year, will it be a better one!? I don’t know, all you can do is hope that it will be and do your best to make sure that it is. 

However, we shouldn’t stress ourselves out wondering what’s to come for the new year, we should just always do our best to appreciate and admire the days as they come, doing that won’t leave you to feel overwhelmed about every little thing, you can just enjoy and also flow with it if you want. You know when you really let yourself take in all the days that come, it brings you into a whole different mode and gives you this feeling of wanting to look at everything deeply, it makes you wonder on a lot of different things and by that I mean like if you were to look at a tree or at the clouds, you know……..makes you wonder how exactly they were made, before we even became apart of this world.

The other day, well a few days ago I was in the car with my mom and I was wondering how people we’re able to create the highways and all that, I mean the world wasn’t always highways, roads, houses ect……..it was all nature and everything, it’s crazy when you really think about stuff like that. You also have the way we are, there’s a lot of different theories on where exactly we came from, there’s just a whole lot of wonder and questions that we don’t entirely know the answers to, we know a certain amount, but we’ll always have that wonder inside of us in wanting to know a definite answer on everything.

If you really think about it, having that mystery of not knowing everything exactly, I mean it’s both scary and exciting in a sense. I mean why should we know everything, that’s why when we’re born, we’re born curious…….to us everything is like a huge giant puzzle, only we don’t ever solve it completely. Normally we can finish a puzzle on our own, but in this case it’s impossible, because even when we think we’ve figured it out, we’ll always have pieces missing and that’s okay, we don’t have to solve every puzzle, we’ll always find certain pieces to fill it, but we won’t entirely figure it out and we don’t need to always figure it out, sometimes it’s just about the feeling of it and by it, I mean………..well everything, everything is just a big huge ball of wonder.

Hey that just reminded me of the Wonderball commercial, if you guys don’t know what a Wonderball is, well it just a chocolate ball with candy inside, it was one of mine and my brother’s favorite candy growing up, they brought it back, but it’s not quite the same as it was before.

This sure went off track, didn’t it haha……don’t ask, I just had a lot of random thoughts floating around and felt like writing them down, I just didn’t think it’d be all of this. It was meant to be about the month December, but it kinda took a different turn after a bit, hey it happens. Feel free to share some of your random thoughts down in the comments below if you have you any and also if December was a person, what kind of stuff would you say to it!?

All The Love ❤ ❤ 

~Lexa~  

Photo by Jasmin Schuler on Unsplash