Up And Early….With Some Thoughts!

Good Morning! Happy Saturday hope you’re all having a very nice and relaxing weekend or just a nice weekend, if you’re up and running around today! I got up a bit early today for no reason, but then went back to sleep for a while, originally when I got up it was about 7:48am I believe, I had a feeling it was early the first time I got up, I just didn’t know it was that early and when I went back to sleep and got up again, it was about 8:26am! I tend to get up around 8am anyway so that’s my usual time of getting myself up, if my body wakes me up early….I’ll get up about 7am and will stay up during that time if I feel I can’t get back to sleep or I’m just feeling like an early bird!

but if I’m just getting up early for nothing, I’ll randomly find myself up between the times of 2am, 3am, 4am, 5am & 6am, lately though the earliest of early of me getting up will be about like maybe 5am or 6am tops the other times are only when I have too much in my head and I have trouble sleeping…..the latest that I tend to get up or prefer to get up is 9am…..sometimes on rare occasions 10am, but that’s only when I’m really really tired and haven’t slept in a while, it’s not my preferred time to get up, but when it happens I know it’s because I barely slept so I try not to beat myself up when I do get up at that time!

I don’t really know why I’m writing about this so if you’re confused well so am I, sometimes I just write whatever feels like coming out and I try not to question it, but I don’t have a clue on why I just explained all of that to you guys…..don’t mind me! Hopefully everyone’s morning has gone well, I know for some of you out there, it’s probably the afternoon or getting close to the evening time, It’s 10am now as I’m continuing writing this post….when I got up this early morning I sat outside for a bit and was taking a lot of things in, for one….you know we’ve arrived in September cause it’s getting more chilly out, although it tends to be pretty cold in the early mornings anyway, but even when it’d not super early and the suns out beaming all over you, you tend to notice how different the air is and how cooler it’s gotten compared to the other days!

You know it’s September when you start to see more Crows flying by, before you’d only see them here and there, but the amount of crows I’ve been seeing since September started just by sitting outside is a good amount to count, it’s quite mad! I know I recently talked about doing a lot of thinking about things, which I am, I’ve not stopped thinking recently, there’s a lot going on personally, some a little too personal to share on here, although sometimes I want to, but I don’t for the simple fact of, it’s not everyone’s business, there are things you keep to yourself and there are things you only share with close people…..

Sometimes though, you don’t even want to share it with the people around you either, because you feel like it will only burden them and it’s best to not say anything and deal with it yourself! However it can get a lot to handle and sometimes you don’t know what to do, but you keep trying anyway, even when you know you should probably stop…..and you want to stop, but then just when you think that everything is good…..it comes right back and you’re there having to deal with it again! You keep strong though and you push through!

but life will keep pushing you until you do something and that could either be approaching the situation and facing the music or you leave it alone and sometimes life pushes you, for you to leave it alone or for you to finally say “THAT’S IT, NO MORE” I guess it all comes back to choosing your battles knowing when to fight or to just surrender, lay down the sword and walk away…..sometimes that’s hard because it could mean leaving something that was once important to you behind…..but at some point you have to realize that you can’t fight every battle and you can’t be the one to fix everything! You can be there for people and you help them in the best way possible, but if they refuse to listen and just continuously bring nothing, but drama after drama, you have to think about what’s best for you and your health!

Ask yourself if you want to keep fighting this fight!? Don’t get me wrong some things are definitely worth fight for, like love, happiness and whatever else you feel is worth it! That being said…..there are things that don’t need to always be fought over and if you find yourself stuck in the same old storm and fighting the same battle constantly, eventually you’re not going to have enough energy left to fight or just use for yourself and that’s where you’ll need to worry because without energy, you’ve already lost the battle….so save your energy and use it wisely on what to use it on!

All The Love ❤ ❤

Lexa

Acceptance Of The Old Or Of The New!? (July 6, 2019)

I’ll be honest, this title is stumping me a little on how i’m going to write about this, even though I titled it this way, there’s always something that is going to be a little of your comfort level, but sometimes you have to try even if you aren’t sure on how it’ll go or sound in this case.

Sometime we accept certain things that we shouldn’t and push away things that can be too much to take in because it evolves changing the things we are already used to, even if those things may be good for us in the long run.

In this case we talk on the topic of change and new beginnings for something better and different…….the word different is something a lot of us don’t like really like to embrace, because it secretly has the word change, hidden within it which makes us want to run and hide from it.

Not everyone likes change as we all know, even if it’s the good kind, we prefer comfort and not having to change anything around us, we see it as why change something when there’s nothing wrong with it!? However even though it may not look like it from the surface, doesn’t mean that there’s nothing wrong hidden deep down inside…….

The insane part about it is that most of the time we know that we’ve grown or are growing out of the comfort of what we know, yet we choose to stay and continue living in the mentally discomfort of our own ways and or bad habits and lifestyle we try to keep around, knowing that it’s harmful to the growth of ourselves and personality, but we accept it thinking that we need to, when in reality it’s not an obligation to do so……we forget that as human beings we’re meant to evolve and change every now and again.

Even if we have things to us that stay the same, it doesn’t mean we fully are the same person, we change a little everyday and our perspectives on things change as well just like everything else to us…..

We may not like it, but it’s something that we have to let happen otherwise, we’re just going to be miserable and that is nothing, but the truth, the more we hold back on something that is natural to our human nature, the more we’ll continue to regret and become unhappy and we all know that regret is the one thing that we don’t want eating us alive mentally, because even when you think you’ve gotten over something, you’ll find that you really haven’t, it’s always there hidden in your mind even if it doesn’t seem like it.

Accepting something because we think we have to or because we’re used to it, will only make us angry deep under the surface and the more we continue adding fuel to it, the more we’ll start to resent and break and when we start to break everything around us starts collapsing……

Worrying about how people will feel, the way everything will go or even about other peoples lives, only adds stress to the person worrying no one else, it might worry others (people you’re close to) but it won’t do as much damage to them then it will to you and that’s because you’re the one feeling it the most which is why you stress out more, when in reality the only thing that is needed for you to focus on, is yourself in regards to the kind of change you want for you and what you’re willing to accept in your life.

If you accept what is already given, not just with other people, but with yourself and the way things are going in your life depending on whether you’re okay with it or not will depend on the way it makes you feel, if you feel good about it than, there’s no need to worry, but if deep down you’re not willing to accept it than, that should say something clearly……

Although we surround ourselves with different people and different things, we are the ones that have to be satisfied with what we bring and allow in our lives otherwise who’s the happy one!? If it’s not us we’ve done things wrong, we shouldn’t allow nor accept something just because we’re used to it or we feel we have to, not from other people, not even from our scared self, acceptance of the old shouldn’t go clashing with things that are new…..

If anything the old and new should come together in some way, because they’re just as tied together as anything else, we don’t have to get rid of what we already have, but we don’t have to just accept it either, keep what you have, but try to embrace what you can have to,

Even if you are unsure of it, you don’t want to be stuck with a routine that is draining and unfulfilling, accepting where you are and what is expected will only drive you up the walls, instead of being afraid and anxious of a new and most likely better change, try being anxious, but excited for it!!

I mean let’s face it no one is ever calm with new things and if you are, well than I don’t know how that’s possible, but I guess it can happen…….but new things should always bring you a little excitement even when it’s terrifying, I mean if you’re not scared a little, do you even really care!? Be anxious and scared, but be excited a little too, because acceptance of the old should never keep you from accepting what is new…..

All The Love ❤ ❤

~Lexa~