You Can’t Hide From Yourself….

Let’s just get it off our chest, we’re uncomfortable…..we don’t like it and we want it to stop, buut it’s not going to is it!? As humans we always think we can escape our own uncomfortability, but the one person that you’re unable to get away from is yourself so what exactly are you doing!? You want to know why I’m uncomfortable!? Well, I’ll try to explain it in a way that, hopefully doesn’t reveal to many personal details, but to keep a long story short….I’m uncomfortable with the fact that, when I’m thinking about something that I know I want to do I will take FOREVER just to decide on it, even when I know I want to do it….

However, one thing about me that I know is my least favorite trait to my personality is…..I’m always siking myself out of things or I overthink it too much to where I already know it frustrates those around me, they don’t have to say it to me because I can feel it and by knowing that, it’ll brings me more stress and frustration because you know the reason you feel like that is due to the fact that you’re afraid to let people down, which wait for it…..adds MORE stress because you’re also fighting with yourself thinking “Why are you worrying about everyone else!?”

Asking yourself that question then just makes you want to scream because although you know why you worry, part of you just wish you didn’t worry or care so much about these things…..and all of that starts mixing together because you could never put you, nor your needs and wants first, leaving you to feel a little upset with yourself, where you’re just like “You always worry about other people and how they’re going to feel” although there’s nothing wrong with caring about others and wanting to make sure they’re going to be okay….

You as person also have to know when it’s time to say “I love you, but no” and be okay with choosing to honor yourself and the things you want to go after! That being said, we also have to live and embrace the uncomfortability of it all!! No matter what we do, we will always be uncomfortable, there’s no way of escaping it, we live to experience, we live to discover and to be amazed along with all the other emotions and feelings we go through within our journey here!

We have to be uncomfortable in order to know what we’re comfortable with, once that’s discovered, we then find and learn what our comfortablities are and how to embrace them along with the uncomfortable! It’s not something we have to necessarily like feeling, but it is something we have to accept whether we want to or not! We have to be okay with the shadow parts of ourselves…..if you really think about it, we’re practically yin and yang inside, we all have the light part of us and the dark part, if we are always leaning towards the light and pushing the dark away, we’re not really giving ourselves the chance to truly experience who we are all the way around…..which isn’t fair!

Just because something is dark doesn’t mean that there isn’t any goodness to it! I may have said this before already, but we all know how diamonds are formed, they go through a lot of pressure before turning into something beautiful!! Amethyst forms from volcantic lava and pearls can be found within oysters, before stones become stones they have to go through some kind of dark experience themselves before we get to see the true beauty of them…..it’s never easy when you feel like every wall is caving in on you or where things are just not going well whatsoever, BUT it’s important to be aware that, all of it is necessary and instead of seeing it as a negative experience automatically, we have to understand that, it happens because we’re evolving and we need it in order for our growth to thrive and for us to continue to be the best versions of ourselves that we already are wheher we see it or not!

We can’t have the good without the bad, even if we prefer it better, the more we try to resist the uncomfortable the more worst and uncomfortable it’s going to get, so allow it, accept it and be okay with it, you don’t have to love it, but honestly who loves being uncomfortable!? Allow the transformation that you’re going to be experiencing to unfold and happen and be amazed at what you see!!

All The Love ❤ ❤

Lexa

Let’s Talk: Encanto (Movie Thoughts)

Happy Monday, Good Morning to all those reading this at whatever time you may happen to come across this! In case you’re wondering, I’m feeling a bit energetic today, so I’m trying to keep this energy going in a more productive kind way, also I’ve been singing a lot of Encanto today, as well as in the past few days so that’s another reason for my energetic mode! Hopefully you all are having a good day so far and that you’re keeping as warm as you can with the cold weather that came upon us this past weekend or just keeping warm in general with the fact that it’s starting to really feel like Winter this time around and that you’re all doing okay too!

Alrighty now that we’ve said our Good Mornings and how do you do’s, let’s get into today’s topic….that is Encanto, I know this is about 2 weeks late to when I originally said I was going to do it…..sorry about that, I ended up, not actually being able to do it like I wanted then, plus I ended up becoming quite under the weather those days so that’s why you have yet to hear the episode that I said I’d record.

I’ve still yet to record the episode, but before I do that I wanted to simply write down my thoughts first that way it’s sorta laid out and makes it easier for me to talk about, I’m not sure if I’ll get too detailed on my thoughts here or in the episode when I’m recording we’ll see how it all goes, but without further ado…..let’s talk Disney’s Encanto! Now if you read my last post that I wrote involving Encanto, you would have learned that I did re watch it and I might’ve mentioned getting super emotional about it the second time, if I didn’t well now you know!

I can’t even begin to share my love for this movie and how many times I’ve sang certain songs from it, but it really is a good movie, like if you have yet to watch Encanto, I would definitely recommend checking it out, hands down! It’s quite the experience and the meaning of it isn’t at face value like most movies are, there’s different interpretations you can take from it, even though the main meaning of it is there.

I’m sure we all know that the first viewing of movies and music and all that is different compared to listening or watching something the 2nd or 3rd time around, by then although there is already a knowing of what’s coming and what’s happening, there’s still parts of it that make it feel like you’re watching it for the very first time again and that’s because what you might’ve missed the first time with it, you’re seeing those things a second time for the first time and with the knowledge of really getting to see it all again in full detail, it makes the 3rd viewing of it also slightly new, but not entirely only the perspective of it changes!

What you thought the first time, becomes different the second time adding one perspective on top of another and around the 3rd time….you know what’s coming and you’ve seen everything for the most part, but with those two combined it’s another first time viewing now that you were able to truly experience it all! Now that being said there could be another perspective and interpretation that you gain from those two watches or listen in case you are hearing or listening to it it for the 3rd time, because you enjoyed it that much, but I’m saying it more on the fact of when combining the first and second viewing another first time experience only this time you know a lot more, hopefully all that made sense, I tried wording it the best way I knew how so I’m hoping that it didn’t get too confusing!

ANYWAY…..Encanto has so much to it, it’s the first movie in a very long time that focuses more on family and that isn’t just about a love story, as much as I love my love stories in movies, being the hopeless romantic that I am….but it’s refreshing to see something different and see this different that is also very relatable to your experiences and having that be there whether it wants to be brought up or not! The amount of times that I tried my HARDEST not to cry in the start of the movie, because I already knew what was going to be revealed, is a tough one to count okay….I was holding it all in up until the middle to end like it’s that kind of movie.

Watching Encanto a second time and really taking it all in, hearing the songs all over again and seeing certain scenes, you really do feel the movie and can’t help, but get a little lost with it! You feel for the main character Mirabel and even the other characters that have to deal with the things that they go through, even though I’ve watched it the first and second time I am trying not to spoil things too much here just in case some of you out there have yet to watch it…..

However I can’t promise there will be no spoilers when I do get around to recording the episode that from the looks of it, might just be a bit different to this post, meaning there will be more things said to elaborate on, but this is practically the base of it all until I actually do record and say other thoughts that I haven’t shared here…..I could share it all, but just know it’ll be a long post if I go and do that which is why I’m not going to do that, honestly I do watch to go into more detail voice wise, but I also wanted to jot certain thoughts of it down in writing…..but yes…..Encanto just has it’s own thing to it that if you’re not paying attention you need to, I mean you don’t actually, but it does helps and you learn a lot as well…..

plus who doesn’t want to listen to that soundtrack that I will eventually most likely also do a podcast episode on maybe, I might split it with a post like I’m doing here in the sense of writing out my thoughts of it in detail and sharing those thoughts differently, but the same in an episode or something I’ve still yet to decide on that, but just know I do plan on discussing the soundtrack to Encanto because it’s amazing and needs to be talked about just as much as the movie also I just want to share my personal favorites and my least, but not because their bad, just more on the fact of they would be the ones that I just don’t listen to as much if that makes sense the whole soundtrack is fantastic I just have my favorites that’s all!

Honestly…..I just flipping love this movie, not because it’s relatable and I understand the meaning to it for the most part, but just because it’s got that something that we haven’t seen in a very long time and the fact that the writers and everyone that worked on Encanto went ahead and weren’t afraid to discuss the topic that are shown throughout it and that everything they did was delivered and received well just shows how much they get it, how much people needed that to be out there so it could be understood and realized, take that in whatever way you feel best, but it’s a movie that we didn’t know we needed until it arrived and I could not be any more happy that it’s out and that people feel and can connect with it the way that they have so far that I’ve noticed!

It really is a breath of fresh air and I hope that we continue to get more movies like it, that allow for other people from different cultures to have their stories and way of life to be shown and learned about from other’s perspective so that way, we all get a better understanding of each other all while trying to evolve in the best way possible moving forward…..so far that’s my thoughts that I got for this post, I would say that this specific blog post is of bigger perspective combined with my own thoughts that I had originally and eventually learned more in detail of watching certain videos to others thoughts as well!

I have more to say, I just can’t say it all here, but just be on a lookout for the continuing of Encanto, in a podcast episode with some theories that I found interesting, some of them I felt myself when watching the movie, while with others it was more “I could see that happening” or just because it’s interesting and wanted to talk about it! Also the soundtrack as I stated earlier will be talked about eventually soon that you will know when you see it!

Take care, stay safe and watch Encanto or don’t whatever you feel, but just consider it maybe…..

All The Love ❤ ❤

Lexa

The Journey Of Learning & Growing….

One of the best things to witness is watching someone grow and evolve, be it a child, someone that you saw go through a very tough point in their life or even just you yourself, there’s no age limit when it comes to learning and growing…..you could be in your 50s and you may already know a whole lot, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still learn something new let alone won’t learn something new, there’s so much to life that will always leave us surprised even when you think you’ve seen it all already!

I’ve witness a few transformations, a lot of them may not be fully, but I’ve seen a few and the ones I have seen, still amaze me and sometimes I find myself thinking about those transformations, I’ve watched my boyfriend come out of something that he struggled with for a while, not necessarily in person, but just the aftermath of what happened in his life in that time, it’s how we met, he was just starting to get back to himself again! I’ve seen my nephew who I consider my nephew, I first met him when he was 3, so I’ve only known him for a year now pretty much and I remember how he’d never wanted to listen to anyone, you know usual kid stuff, his favorite word was always NO and you couldn’t tell him anything, without him crying and throwing tantrums and wanting everything to be his way

and then you have his mom who worked all the time and when it came to trying to stop him from having those tantrums it was hard for her to put her foot down with him, obviously no parent wants to yell at their child, any good parent anyway, it’s hard because you try to be a parent, but you also don’t want to be a parent in a sense of when your child starts throwing those tantrums and they aren’t listening to you, you don’t want to have to punish them for it, because all you want is for them to see you in the best light possible and when you come to those moments to where you know there needs to be rules……it can be hard, but sometimes you know you have to do it!

But back to what I was talking about…..all three people here have gone through big transformations and you wouldn’t believe it if I told you, my boyfriend one of the biggest transformation I’ve ever seen and also haven’t seen, but if you knew him when I met him and you were to see and learn about everything he endured, you’d be extremely surprised, it still surprises me when I think about it sometimes, just to see and learn the difference in the person that he once was to who he is now, like I wouldn’t know where to begin on that story, hopefully I’ll be able to really tell it or have him tell it one day, I mean it is story about his journey anyway and it really is a beautiful and life changing one at that! I’m very proud of how far he’s gotten, I love you Jord, forever and always!

As for my Nephew…..he’s 4 now, but will be turning 5 in November and let me tell you something, he is one hell of a smart kid, seriously and he’s gotten a lot better at really trying to understand everything, he doesn’t give you too much of a issue now when you are telling him not to do something or you’re trying to help him learn certain things, he actually listens expressing something to him which I’m glad to see, it was a mission and a half when I first met him, he talks a whole lot more now, like a lot, he wouldn’t really say much before, he was just always shy and wouldn’t come up to you, he’d just be in his own little world, now forget about it!! He will talk to you for hours if he really wanted to, he’s quite the character, very silly, but he’s the sweetest boy every, he’s very kind, he likes making people laugh and just showing you things all the time, buut don’t let his adorableness fool, he knows what he’s doing!

He’s a little demon and I say it all the time to him, which he knows too because he always laughs about it! He knows how to get what he wants, however he knows who to go for when he wants something, spoiler it’s not me, he knows better than to pull anything with me, like I said he’s a smart one, I wouldn’t be surprised if he turned out to be an evil genius, I’m joking, he’s a good kid when he wants to be, but he’s also grown to know better and I just hope that continues the older he gets!

Lastly, we come to my Nephew’s mom who has also transformed a lot from when I met her, she’s kind of hard to explain with her transformation though, but I’ll do my best, when I first started coming around and hanging out with her, she was always working, but she worked from home, so she always tried her best to balance out work and her son and when I was hanging out with her as she was working, I would notice a lot that she was having to do, when it came to her son like I said earlier it was hard for her to put her foot down with him at first, because she didn’t like having to be that….not strict parent, cause she’s really not that strict, but he’d would get babied a lot before, he still does, but it’s not so much from his mom these days, but the grandparents…..you know how that goes!

It was hard for her to tell him when he was doing something wrong and when it came to punishment so that he learns that he can’t do certain things, with work she was always stressing, she dealt with a lot….I guess the only way I can say it is her transformation comes from how she’s grown as a parent from when I met her and what I know her to be now as well as how certain parts of her personality has changed and grown, she’d always wanted to please everyone even when she didn’t want to do whatever it was that she didn’t want to do, she’s showing more of her voice with people,

Which is good and she would always feel like nothing was going her way, but now everything is now working for her which is great, in terms of her son, she’s learn to put her foot down with him more and not let him try and control her and what I love about that is, I feel since then, both her and her son have gotten more closer and it’s a beautiful things to see, because you can tell she loves her son and only wants the best for him and that’s how parent should be and he loves her which is also wonderful! I’ve witness what she had to go through before and I’m so proud of her for how far she’s come even if she doesn’t know it, she’s an amazing mom and an amazing person, as well as a really good friend and I’m glad that I got to know her and continue to get to know her, fun fact, we’ve crossed paths before me and her a few time even, but we never actually encountered one another face to face just always by a pass by, it wasn’t until she started dating my brother to where we finally met, I guess you can call it a small word!

The three people I just spoke about all mean something to me and I’m glad to know them and have them apart of my life, I’m glad that I’ve been able to experience the transformations they’ve gone through, they all have taught me a lot of things as well as important lessons and are still teaching me a lot even if they don’t know it necessarily, but I wouldn’t trade them and all that they’ve taught me for the world and if ever down the line our journey’s together were to take different paths or transform in some kind of way to where I still have them in my life, I’m always going to take what they’ve given me and do my best to make sure I never forget it!

F.Y.I. I didn’t expect to write all of this, the way I did, I just felt very strongly to write this for some reason so I did, call it a moment of a thought in time!!

P.S.

By the way, I’ve switched up my podcast episode schedule just for this week, so instead of Monday, Wednesday and Friday, I’m doing Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday (I’m going to try for Saturday anyway) again just for this week, I just felt like switching things up a a bit! You can check out yesterday’s episode here:

Take Flight Like A Bird…. Ep. 37 Daydreamer's Podcast

Happy Tuesday everyone, hope your having a good day! In todays episode we talk a bit about birds and the way they fly, not just about that though, it gets a bit deeper than that, we're always afraid to explore the unknown and take those big leaps that we've been wanting to take, but isn't that what life's about!? Facing those unsure feelings and seeing where it takes you, just like that Moana song, one day I'll know how far I'll go!!

All The Love ❤ ❤ ❤

Lexa